I am new to the Buddhist journey but everything I have read and pondered hits resonant notes like nothing else I have been involved in including the ten years of evangelical Christianity.
Most of my life I have been lost and had a searching heart but was not ready or receptive to the truth so I lost myself in stimulants and academic learning of spiritual principles but with a total disconnect to me in the here and now. I cared little for my body - I let my heart and mind control me and remained happily (I thought) in a state of unconscious ignorance.
I learned TM several years ago and while a holy word and a method of sitting helped me relax I still did not really understand the nature of truth ... I saw through a glass darkly.
I then experienced some serious vascular health problems that resulted in my having a stent placed near the heart 3 years ago and the right femoral artery in my right leg removed last year.
This led me to get serious about life as I had been walking through fog for years without realising it.
I downloaded a compendium of Buddhist writing edited by Melvin McLeod and things started to open up to me. Since then I have been reading Lama Yeshe's writings and that of other Buddhists including His Holiness the Dalai Lama. I started to care for my body after years of chronic neglect and this too has really helped me to be present and connect ...
The honesty and realism is what is so refreshing - instead of starting out from a perspective of being sinful by nature Buddhism says that we simply learn to watch the mind to learn our true nature and that the truth is not "out there" in some indeterminate future.
Practice is not as easy as words on paper but the journey has started, everything in me cries "truth" ... I feel challenged and alive like never before and this is my first foray into community ... my history is of Lone Ranger as I liked to keep myself insulated from any form of challenge.
I look forward to learning from and encouraging others ...