“What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God

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“What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God

Postby Ben » Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:46 am

God Freaks Self Out By Lying Awake Contemplating Own Immortality

THE HEAVENS—Sources close to God reported Thursday that the Creator of the Universe and Author of Our Eternal Salvation suffered a crippling bout of existential dread this week, lying awake all night as He pondered His own immortality...

...Reasoning that He would be able to calm down if He just had something to take His all-knowing mind off everything, God reportedly read 1,000 books and created several million new nebulae, but sources said the Supreme Being’s thoughts inevitably returned to the inescapable fact that He is ultimately trapped for all eternity in the infinite expanse of the cosmos.

-- http://www.theonion.com/articles/god-fr ... g-o,31097/
"One cannot step twice into the same river, nor can one grasp any mortal substance in a stable condition, but it scatters and again gathers; it forms and dissolves, and approaches and departs."

- Hereclitus


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Re: “What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God

Postby plwk » Fri Feb 01, 2013 1:05 am

At press time, sources confirmed the Lord had fallen asleep after resolving that first thing in the morning He would create an immortal dog or cat to keep Him company for the rest of eternity

Image
Bhikkhus, if you develop and make much this one thing,
it invariably leads to weariness, cessation, appeasement, realization and extinction.
What is it? It is recollecting the Enlightened One.
If this single thing is recollected and made much,
it invariably leads to weariness, cessation, appeasement, realization and extinction.

Anguttara-Nikaya: Ekanipata: Ekadhammapali: Pañhamavagga
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Re: “What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God

Postby Ben » Fri Feb 01, 2013 2:06 am

Hi plwk,
I trust you to pick out an appropriate lolcat picture appropriate to the story!

plwk wrote:
The Onion wrote:At press time, sources confirmed the Lord had fallen asleep after resolving that first thing in the morning He would create an immortal dog or cat to keep Him company for the rest of eternity

I wonder whether that was an allusion Rumford and Kazak in Vonneguts 'The Sirens of Titan'
Hmmm...
"One cannot step twice into the same river, nor can one grasp any mortal substance in a stable condition, but it scatters and again gathers; it forms and dissolves, and approaches and departs."

- Hereclitus


Compassionate Hands Foundation (Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • Buddhist Global Relief

Buddhist Life Stories of Australia

e: ben.dhammawheel@gmail.com
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Re: “What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God

Postby tiltbillings » Fri Feb 01, 2013 4:28 am

Image
This being is bound to samsara, kamma is his means for going beyond.
SN I, 38.

Ar scáth a chéile a mhaireas na daoine.
People live in one another’s shelter.

"We eat cold eels and think distant thoughts." -- Jack Johnson
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