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“What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 12:46 am
by Ben
God Freaks Self Out By Lying Awake Contemplating Own Immortality
THE HEAVENS—Sources close to God reported Thursday that the Creator of the Universe and Author of Our Eternal Salvation suffered a crippling bout of existential dread this week, lying awake all night as He pondered His own immortality...
...Reasoning that He would be able to calm down if He just had something to take His all-knowing mind off everything, God reportedly read 1,000 books and created several million new nebulae, but sources said the Supreme Being’s thoughts inevitably returned to the inescapable fact that He is ultimately trapped for all eternity in the infinite expanse of the cosmos.
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http://www.theonion.com/articles/god-fr ... g-o,31097/" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Re: “What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 1:05 am
by plwk
At press time, sources confirmed the Lord had fallen asleep after resolving that first thing in the morning He would create an immortal dog or cat to keep Him company for the rest of eternity
Re: “What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 2:06 am
by Ben
Hi plwk,
I trust you to pick out an appropriate lolcat picture appropriate to the story!
plwk wrote:The Onion wrote:At press time, sources confirmed the Lord had fallen asleep after resolving that first thing in the morning He would create an immortal dog or cat to keep Him company for the rest of eternity
I wonder whether that was an allusion Rumford and Kazak in Vonneguts 'The Sirens of Titan'
Hmmm...
Re: “What is the point—I mean, seriously, what’s the point?” God
Posted: Fri Feb 01, 2013 4:28 am
by tiltbillings
