Thanissaro Bhikkhu wrote:Don't think of equanimity as a heartless or cold state of mind. It's simply a very realistic way of looking at things. Notice that in the Four Sublime Attitudes, the other three are, "May all living beings be this way, May all living beings be that way." But when you get to the fourth one, the thought is, "All living beings are the owners of their actions." There's no may in there, it's just a statement of fact. You recognize reality, you recognize the limitations in this causal realm in which we operate, and you make up your mind to work within those limitations in as creative and effective way as is possible.
From: Intelligent Equanimity by Thanissaro Bhikkhu
Thanissaro Bhikkhu wrote:The Buddha isn't saying that equanimity is better than the other three attitudes. You just learn which situations require which attitude: which situations require goodwill, which require compassion, which require appreciation, which require equanimity. In this way, equanimity is not simply passive acceptance. It's an ordering of your priorities, telling you to stop wasting energy on things that can't be changed, and to focus it instead on areas where good will, compassion, and appreciation can make a difference.
From: The Story-telling Mind by Thanissaro Bhikkhu
Thanissaro Bhikkhu wrote:Equanimity (upekkha) is a different emotion, in that it acts as an aid to and a check on the other three. When you encounter suffering that you can't stop no matter how hard you try, you need equanimity to avoid creating additional suffering and to channel your energies to areas where you can be of help. In this way, equanimity isn't cold hearted or indifferent. It simply makes your goodwill more focused and effective.
From: Head & Heart Together: Bringing Wisdom to the Brahma-viharas by Thanissaro Bhikkhu
With metta / dhammapal.