Layman's practice - One's relations to others

A discussion on all aspects of Theravāda Buddhism

Layman's practice - One's relations to others

Postby Hanzze » Fri Jan 21, 2011 11:42 am

One's relations to others

Buddha showed to us how to reach the definitive cessation of any form of dissatisfaction. Before reaching it, the path is long, it requires for each of us to perfect at all levels, beginning from the base, otherwise how could we build anything on impure bases? Let us feel reassured, the Buddha does not forget anybody; he explains, giving invaluable details, how every person has to act if he/she wishes to benefit from an existence that is as profitable as possible for oneself and for others, regardless of the social milieu and position in society.

He explains, among other things, how to manage a business or how a king (or a head of state) should act towards his people, and all, quite naturally, with the aim of establishing an ideal for all in terms of human relations and mutual respect, and, consequently, to offer everyone a framework suitable for training in the dhamma. Thus, below, the duties of one to others according to the Buddha, for anyone wishing to lead his life in the most noble and the most profitable way, that of the dhamma.

Comment: Cultural customs are very different from one country to another and from one time to the other. It is necessary in certain cases, to know how to adapt in consequence.

The duties of a child to his (her) parents

1. To nourish them when they are not longer able to provide for their own needs because of their age. 2. To take care of their administrative procedures. 3. To continue the good practices of the family like honesty, generosity etc. 4. To be worthy to receive their material and spiritual heritage. 5. To perform ceremonies after their death.

The duties of a parent to his (her) children

1. To accustom them from very small to a good moral conduct. 2. To teach them good social manners (respect for others). 3. To transmit them knowledge and a harmless profession. 4. To marry them to a partner of good moral conduct who is suitable for them. 5. To bequeath them their inheritance when the time comes.

The duties of the pupil to his (her) teacher

1. To get up in sign of respect and go to receive him (her) when he (she) arrives. 2. To render him (her) a service if necessary. 3. To be eager to listen to his (her) advice. 4. If living with him (her), to help him (her) with the daily chores. 5. To try hard to learn what one does not yet know and not to forget what one has already learnt.

The duties of the teacher to his (her) pupil

1. To instruct him (her) well in matters concerning social life, customs and manners, as well as in the spiritual field. 2. To make sure that he (she) retains well what one teaches by making him repeat several times in the day. 3. To teach everything one knows without concealing anything. 4. To introduce him (her) to one's friends and associates so that he (she) can obtain a job. 5. To guarantee his (her) material and spiritual safety (recitation of protective texts).

The duties of the husband to his wife

1. To be respectful to her and not to address her with vulgar words. 2. Not to disdain her. 3. To be faithful. 4. To give her the housekeeping money and allow her free management of it. 5. To buy her beautiful clothes and jewellery.

The duties of the wife to her husband

1. To be prudent and to dedicate herself entirely to the care of the household. 2. Know how to receive his friends and members of his family. 3. To be faithful. 4. To administer suitably the property and finances. 5. To be skilled in all household duties (cookery, sewing, ironing, etc.)
Top of pageBottom of page

The duties of a young man to his friends

1. To be generous and open-hearted. 2. To speak politely. 3. To be ready to render service. 4. To avoid putting himself above others and to give the same chances to everybody. 5. To be honest.

The duties of friends to young men

1. To protect their health when they are unconscious (drunk, doped). 2. To protect their possessions when they are unconscious (drunk, doped). 3. To protect them from imminent dangers. 4. Not to abandon them when they have troubles. 5. To take care with benevolence of their children (giving them employment or other services).

The duties of an employee to his (her) employer

1. To get up before him (her). 2. To go to bed after him (her). 3. To take only what is given. 4. To take one's duties seriously. 5. Not to speak badly of him (her), to speak well of him (her).

The duties of an employer to his (her) employees

1. To give them work according with their capacity. 2. To give them food and a salary. 3. To take care of them in case of illness. 4. To share with them the good food or drink when available. 5. To grant them proper leave.

The duties of a lay person to a monk

1. To perform actions motivated by loving kindness. 2. To say words motivated by loving kindness. 3. To have thoughts of loving kindness. 4. To invite him to visit one's house if necessary and to invite him to report his needs. 5. To provide him with the four requisites: lodging, clothing, food and medicines, within the limitations of one's means.

The duties of a monk to a lay person

1. To teach in order to avoid what is unwholesome (cause of suffering for oneself and others). 2. To encourage him (her) in what is wholesome (source of happiness) like generosity, virtue and meditation. 3. To generate loving kindness towards him (her). 4. To teach what he does not know. 5. To repeat what he already knows. 6. To show the way to a more comfortable rebirth (deva world) or towards nibbāna.

Source: http://en.dhammadana.org/dhamma/practice/laity.htm
This page contains a lot of simple explanations for Laypeople and keeps it simple and easy to follow.
Just that! *smile*
...We Buddhists must find the courage to leave our temples and enter the temples of human experience, temples that are filled with suffering. If we listen to Buddha, Christ, or Gandhi, we can do nothing else. The refugee camps, the prisons, the ghettos, and the battlefields will become our temples. We have so much work to do. ... Peace is Possible! Step by Step. - Samtach Preah Maha Ghosananda "Step by Step" http://www.ghosananda.org/bio_book.html

BUT! it is important to become a real Buddhist first. Like Punna did: Punna Sutta Nate sante baram sokham _()_
User avatar
Hanzze
 
Posts: 1906
Joined: Mon Oct 04, 2010 12:47 pm
Location: Cambodia

Re: Layman's practice - One's relations to others

Postby chownah » Fri Jan 21, 2011 2:13 pm

You posted:

"The duties of a monk to a lay person

1. To teach in order to avoid what is unwholesome (cause of suffering for oneself and others). 2. To encourage him (her) in what is wholesome (source of happiness) like generosity, virtue and meditation. 3. To generate loving kindness towards him (her). 4. To teach what he does not know. 5. To repeat what he already knows. 6. To show the way to a more comfortable rebirth (deva world) or towards nibbāna.....
......"

Is it really a monk's duty to teach what they do not know????? Seems like a typo here but I'm not sure.
chownah
chownah
 
Posts: 2710
Joined: Wed Aug 12, 2009 2:19 pm

Re: Layman's practice - One's relations to others

Postby bodom » Fri Jan 21, 2011 3:06 pm

chownah wrote:You posted:

"The duties of a monk to a lay person

1. To teach in order to avoid what is unwholesome (cause of suffering for oneself and others). 2. To encourage him (her) in what is wholesome (source of happiness) like generosity, virtue and meditation. 3. To generate loving kindness towards him (her). 4. To teach what he does not know. 5. To repeat what he already knows. 6. To show the way to a more comfortable rebirth (deva world) or towards nibbāna.....
......"

Is it really a monk's duty to teach what they do not know????? Seems like a typo here but I'm not sure.
chownah


It is correct. What is meant is that it is the monks duty to teach the layperson what the layperson does not know.

Here are alternative translations:

"The ascetics and brahmans thus ministered to as the Zenith by a householder show their compassion towards him in six ways:
(i) they restrain him from evil, (ii) they persuade him to do good, (iii) they love him with a kind heart, (iv) they make him hear what he has not heard, (v) they clarify what he has already heard, (vi) they point out the path to a heavenly state.


"And, ascetics and Brahmans so respected reciprocate with compassion in six ways: by restraining you from wrongdoing, guiding you to good actions, thinking compassionately, telling you what you ought to know, clarifying what you already know, and showing you the path to heaven.


:anjali:
The heart of the path is SO simple. No need for long explanations. Give up clinging to love and hate, just rest with things as they are. That is all I do in my own practice. Do not try to become anything. Do not make yourself into anything. Do not be a meditator. Do not become enlightened. When you sit, let it be. When you walk, let it be. Grasp at nothing. Resist nothing. Of course, there are dozens of meditation techniques to develop samadhi and many kinds of vipassana. But it all comes back to this - just let it all be. Step over here where it is cool, out of the battle. - Ajahn Chah
User avatar
bodom
 
Posts: 4612
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 6:18 pm
Location: San Antonio, Texas


Return to General Theravāda discussion

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Fluke, Google [Bot], Yahoo [Bot] and 11 guests