regarding the monastic situation of seclusion from seeing beautiful forms, sounds, (add the other senses too
) of women, I agree that it makes celibacy, and thus more calm in meditation, easier to achieve.
I once spent nine months without a single orgasm. I was so brahmacarya that, one night while in the dream-state, I was about to have sex and suddenly remembered that "this is a dream, and in the real world I am brahmacarya", and passed up the opportunity. I was living in a Hindu-style ashram at the time, with no internet, media or women around.
And yet...I feel that I have made more
progress towards the surmounting of lust in the last three days here at home, than I did in those nine months back then. This is because I am NOT secluded from women, I HAVE to interact with them, and the INTERNET with its vast legions of free porn sites is always here for me. I have to literally use all of my powers of discrimination every single day
to remain celibate under these circumstances. Sometimes at the end of the day I am in tears because I choose the Dhamma over quick and easy pleasure. (Sometimes I fail miserably too, btw). I am forced to use wisdom to defend myself, precisely because I am NOT secluded, do you see what I mean? (I am in trying to practice abstinence from orgasm for the sake of better meditation practice at present.)
So I encourage you to see how being exposed to sense objects can actually help
us in our practice. There is somewhere where the Buddha says words to the effect that 'wherever there is that which is aggreeable, pleasing and delightful, there
this craving can be abandoned". (emphasis mine). Right there, where the mind contacts a sense object!
(could someone please give me the exact quote / sutta no. etc as I can't place it.):)
Then again, if you do not have any children or dependents, and you feel the yearning for renunciation, why not just give it a try? You can always change your mind and come back to lay life if it turns out not to be for you after all.