Beautiful Breath wrote:Either way, if I ask myself "...do you want this woman back in your life..."? the answer is a resounding NO!!!
So why on earth am I still feeling such a yearning for her?
If you don't want her back in your life... are you sure that your feelings are related to her? If these feelings didn't come till you started having problems with her, are you sure that she was the cause, or that these problems were even the cause?
Maybe it's something else. It's very easy to make connections between one thing to another, when there's really none. Many people don't even notice this... because it's an automatic process, due to their habits.
I remember a long time ago, when I had a lot of problems with this one woman. She made me feel really terrible, or at least so I thought. I stopped seeing her, but this feeling still lingered. I blamed her for it. After a while, I stopped caring about her, but the painful feeling still lingered... so where was it coming from?
After a few years, I'm at peace with her, and even looked at her from a positive light... but this bad feeling still pops up, every now and then, and seems like it has nothing to do with her. So what's causing it? And what really caused it back then, when I had a falling out with her? Apparently, she was just a convenient target for me to put my blame on.
Just look at the feelings as pleasant, not pleasant, neutral... don't try to connect them to anything. Pay attention to what they really are, or where they really come from. This is not easy. That why you just sit...