letting go of craving and aversion

[befriend]

hahhaha it seems like all of life is only about letting go of craving and aversion in terms of suffering. when someone trips and hurts there wrist, we help them out of compassion for there suffering. there suffering is caused by aversion. this is crazy. its only craving and aversion that cause suffering. if i fall down i would hurt my leg, but i would really only be suffering becauase aversion arose, then we let go of the aversion and there is no suffering. is this accurate? this is a question not a statement. can someone please elaborate simply.

[DarwidHalim]

If someone lose his hand, the one that cause suffering is actually not losing his hand. But, it is I am losing MY hand.

When we personalize everything as mine, we are actually starting to put the seed of suffering.

Personalization comes from craving and attachment. So, if you can eliminate them, it is actually similar with destroying that personaliZation.

If you think about it, the source of suffering is actually this I and mine.

If you can eliminate that, giving your own eyes is as simple as giving 1 cent.

[befriend]

so if you get hungry you feel pain then you feel aversion then you go eat something. isnt aversion good in that case? i thought aversion was a defilement that only lead to suffering. is there a good aversion, it seems like the aversion to hunger is healthy. i dont like it i dont like being hungry, is that a defilement? can someone elucidate how letting go of craving and aversion all the time is not nihilistic?

[befriend]

ok i found my answer, it is called chanda, the desire for wholesome well being.

[cooran]

Hello befriend,

Chanda's meaning is a good deal more than you say:

Chanda
http://what-buddha-said.net/library/Bud ... htm#chanda

with metta
Chris

[Sarva]

Hi Befriend
One way I look at it is is that the suffering comes from the 'ups and downs' in life, but not from life itself. For example one day we are happy the next we are fed up without any real reason. Or we feel happy eating pizza and icecream then an hour later feel guilty and ashamed. It is this see-saw affect that traps us and controls our happiness.To be free from this 'up and down' and find a happy equilibrium is where Dharma steps in.

Buddha found that the 'downs' are caused because we crave and cling to the 'ups'. We keep pursuing mundane pleasures, such as physical pleasure: films, food, sex, entertainment etc, but due to their very nature they will not keep us happy for long. Their nature is the same as all of nature, it is impermanent (anicca) and what starts will always end. We don't want them to end, we are averse to the loss of pleasure or unpleasent (no pleasure) things.

Our ignorant nature makes us cling to the pleasure, the 'ups', and averse (aversion) to the 'downs' e.g. we don't want to go to work and suffer another boring day, we don't want to stop indulging in worldly pleasure like fast food etc. We would much rather have an "up" even at the risk of our responsibilities. This is how craving and aversion keeps us under control emotionally.

The Buddha found that there is a freedom away from their control, and that is through the realisation that there is a happiness inside each one us which is much much greater than any physical pleasure and is not subject to 'ups and downs'. It is a happiness which is not subject to impermanence (anicca) and so there will be no emotional 'ups and down'. This 'happiness' is called 'nibanna' to help people to talk about it and find it in themselves. Once found then all the mundane looses its control over us. There is no 'ups and downs' as before. However what is important to note is that we can still interact with the world, we can still eat pizza, make love and watch films, but when the experience ends we are still in control (we don't go 'down'), we can go without them or we can go with them, either way we are happy (as we know nibbana). So this is why it is not nihilism, it is still a full life.

The problem is that we can become so focused on the method and the escape from suffering that it sounds like we are also saying that living is hell and there is nothing to live for (nihilism). This is NOT true, this is a "wrong view" and is not what Dharma and the middle path is about. I too had to question nihilism and found it was not the same as Dharma (Dhamma).

Please feel free to question any of the above. Best wishes