Alobha wrote:Hey OneWayOut
What exactly are you afraid of?
I really don't know. I try to find something specific but I think my mind isn't "clear" enough to find it yet.
I didn't have an awesome childhood which would be the root of my problem. Till age 6 everything was normal but than we moved to a new place where we were the only foreigners and that probably didn't do any good since I started too feel really anxious around people and be alone most of the time.
Latest 1.5years I travelled and moved a lot, been in this "temporary" place since a few months (feeling lonely most of the time) and I'm going to a student room in 2 weeks. On the good side I learned so much the latest year, I'm finely able to let some of my thought go and from time to time even if I feel anxious about something specific I can let that feeling be there and just do it but I have a long way to go also.
Back to my question It's like I just wake up and immediatly start to feel nervous. Look for the first thing to distract me. Meditation helps to give me that moment where I can think like a bit more clearer and the nervousness is gone but it's so hard for me to do so in the morning.
Thinking about it loneliness is a big problem right now and probably is making me feel most uncomfortable of all.
(I'm still a beginner with the meditation been meditating inconsistently for 4 months now)