The ethics of minimizing suffering and being a "good person"

[befriend]

the first thing you think of when you kill many innocent beings is what will my karma be? hahahaha no wonder society thinks your a good person.
i dont care what anyone says to me about this. societies ethics. thats an oxymoron. you mean the people who cant decide wether or not its negative to
kill a fetus, or kill someone in a coma because they dont pay taxes, the people who think your a saint because you gave a bum a ticket to the red sox. dont give me that there is no person. yes in conventional reality there is good and bad. so in ultamite reality there are no people. but in conventional reality there is good and bad. including people. if society calls you a good person take that as in insult. society doesnt give a shit, they daydream all day, and your considered spiritual if you took a reiki class, and your religious if you go to church every other month. let alone if you told them your weaning off music, stopped drinking, celibate, and beat yourself up for about 30 minutes so you make sure you dont grumble a mean word under your breath again.

[befriend]

you feel no shame for killing many innocent sentient beings you killed them for no reason. you feel unnatural to feel empathy for these beings. and you do this a lot. after you visualize you being an ant, you still like to cause chaos for them. so because your a nice person who kills other beings you think you have a get out of jail free card. i dont know what to say except yes YOU BROKE THE FIRST THE FIRST PRECEPT MANY MANY TIMES, taking the lives of beings is heavy karma. and you will suffer so thats all you care about. you never cared about the ants. you just care about going to hell. you should be concerned with the ants, not yourself, not yourself at all, all you should care about is the ants.