VeganLiz wrote:The Five Precepts speak against sexual misconduct.
But what exactly does that imply? Just terrible things such as molestation / rape? Or does it imply that sex is between lovers in a committed relationship only? Is casual sex advised against?
I am curious. Sex is a new thing in my life.
I think most people are have different views what compromises sexual misconduct..
So what i do is just see what the purpose of this precept is..why is it there in the first place..
i see this precept's ultimate goal is to "eradicate lust".
I know you can not eradicate something as powerful as lust through purely just obeying some rule and restraining yourself,you will have to do it by purifying your mind..it has to happen in the inside to truly let it go..the problem is this could take ages...lifetimes perhaps..and bad kamma is not going to wait around for you to come to your senses..which could jeopardize your chances of Realizing the Truth and finally put a stop to all your suffering.so in the mean time what you Really Can Do is restrain yourself..knowing that you are contributing a large effort in eradicating lust from your mind.
Because everybody has different views i can't tell someone else not to do something i think is unskillfull..which is why i don't really worry about other people and mostly just focus on what works for me..I Also don't accept something only because other people think there's nothing wrong with it.I first learned to know myself..and understood what calms and what aggravates my mind..it's just a cause and effect and got nothing to do with what's right and what's wrong or what you think or what i think.
It's something i know that if i do has brought me bad results.
Personally, Sexual misconduct for me would be:
4.Pornography,Nudity or any Erotic subjects.
5.Prostitution or working in any type of sex based industry.
6.Sexual fantasies or day dreaming, dirty thoughts.I always put a stop to it the moment i notice it.someone once told me don't argue against these thoughts,you'll lose, just stop
.Yana does not negotiate with "terrorists
7.High Sexual content on TV programs..i'm not a kid anymore..it's not like i have to close my eyes or anything..and there's probably nothing wrong with it..it's just "normal" that's what people say..ofcourse there's nothing wrong with everything i just mentioned before,but any thing that could make Lust arise in my mind is not worth my time.My favourite break up line:It's Not YOU it's ME.
7.Too much sex.Not that i have anything against sex but I have to be balanced because too much sex caused loss of energy for me.and makes me almost lethargic.
So at the end of the day i am not saying all these things are unskillfull..there is nothing wrong with a brothel..it's just a building..made out of stone..or nudity it's just body parts..you should judge something as a sexual misconduct on whether they cause lust to arise in your mind or not
..so yeahh..that's prettttty harrd stuff and most of us including me can't do all of it.. but we all gotta start somewhere...
So PERSONALLY this is my point of view, ( again everyone is different so i don't care if other people,Buddhist or Not, do it ..i only care that I don't do it
because from personal experience and observations, i will feel very aggravated and unstable..and it will take a lot of work to get me back to calm my mind.