Be careful when posting to a thread on masturbation when your signature line mentions the "compassionate hands foundation." I wasn't being cheeky. I was just reading down the thread and for some involuntary neurological reason the phrase "compassionate hands" kinda jumped out at me.
This meditation has a special place in the Dharma. It is one of very few subjects of meditation which contain both a tranquillity aspect and an insight aspect. As well, it is a very useful practical meditation, providing a powerful antidote to the hindrance of lust.
There is nothing here to beat yourself over. If anything, you might try extending some compassion towards yourself. And when you are having these urges, before get out of hand (or in hand), best when you just feel the initial inkling, just sit quietly and pay attention without comment to what you are feeling, the urge to resist the action, the urge to act on the desire. Even though the habits are deeply established, you can choose how to act here, to sit quietly, paying attention.UrgeSurfer wrote:I find myself browsing inappropriate websites and engaging in self-sex. I spend way too much time fantasising about other women even
tiltbillings wrote:… the basics are there to just pay attention to what arises and falls in your mind/body as the urge to act out starts to present itself. Like the habit you developed, it will need to be done over and over. There is really no other way.
“Having thought of a mind object, one loses mindfulness. Getting involved in the attraction of it, one feels the onset of desire that tries to imbibe it.”
“A multitude of passions such as covetousness and rage, springing from ideas, torments one who takes a firm hold of it, with the result that his mind becomes burdened with vexation. Therefore, nibbāna remains remote from one who would rather carry the burden of suffering than practise meditation.”
Bhikkhu Pesala wrote:Samatha meditation is not enough — one should practice vipassanā meditation.
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