The point is to not to worry about all the "insights", not to worry about keeping what you have and trying to get more; rather, just do the practice. The reality is that the practice is really about letting go. Letting go is not something you can force; rather, it is a matter seeing things as they are, repeatedly over time. Just continue with the practice.After only a year and a half of practice at Wat Ba Pong, one American [Jack Kornfield] asked and received permission [from Ajahn Chah] to travel and study with other Thai and Burmese teachers. A year or two later, he returned full of tales of his travels, of many months of extraordinary and intensive practice and of a number of remarkable experiences. . . . Then the Western monk went to the cottage of Achaan Sumedho, the senior Western disciple of Achaan Chah, and told all his stories and adventures, his new understandings and great insights into practice. Sumedho listened in silence and prepared afternoon tea from the roots of certain forest plants. When the stories were completed and the insights recounted, Sumedho smiled and said, "Ah, how wonderful. Something else to let go of."
Ben wrote:Hi householder
keep in mind that sensations, regardless whether they are pleasant, unpleasant or neutral, share the same characteristics. That is, they are impermanent, dukkha and anatta. Just keep maintaining your focus on meditation object as per your instructions without identifying with whatever you are experiencing or not experiencing. Also keep in mind that pleasant sensations are much more difficult to deal with as craving, particularly very subtle craving, is incredibly hard to manage.
Geez, don't worry about all that stuff; it'll drive you crazy, and it sounds like it is already driving you to distraction. Just sit, just pay attention.householder wrote:The last sit: . . .
In other words, you have driven yourself to distraction. Pay attention to your breathing and don't worry about all the other stuff. Just bring your attention gently back to your breath -- in and out. Or if it is your abdomen that you are watching, then rise and fall. Gently, time and again, bringing your attention back to the rise and fall. Keep it simple and easy.householder wrote:Tilt, given I've gone in just over a week from barely being able to focus on the breath for several breaths to several vastly different states with different phenomenon, now manifested in the breath going from perfectly discernible and concentrated to being vague and lots of peripheral sensations which are becoming the main object of attention, it's a little overwhelming and I'm having difficulty discerning whether to keep focusing on rising and falling no matter what, forcing attention on the same, or allow awareness to be what it is and where it is at each moment.
As Goofaholix says, conditions and practice on retreat are different to practice off retreat so I'm in the process of feeling my way through. It's all very well saying "Just sit, pay attention", but to what? The rising and falling, like on retreat, which is becoming more solid, less discernible, or these vibrations/pulses, or both, or the whole thing? Your advice is vague and unhelpful.
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