Wrong speech on this forum

Buddhist ethical conduct including the Five Precepts (Pañcasikkhāpada), and Eightfold Ethical Conduct (Aṭṭhasīla).
PeterB
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by PeterB »

Another way to access the debate linked to in the TOS.
Second topic, then "read more "

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Vepacitta
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Vepacitta »

I rarely post here anymore and when I do, it's usually to push back at bullies.

V.
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tiltbillings
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by tiltbillings »

Vepacitta wrote:I rarely post here anymore
Which is too bad. You made positive contributions here.
and when I do, it's usually to push back at bullies.
The forum is what people make it. There a lot of different personalities here, both difficult and easy to get along with.

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>> Do you see a man wise [enlightened/ariya] in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him.<< -- Proverbs 26:12

This being is bound to samsara, kamma is his means for going beyond. -- SN I, 38.

“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?” HPatDH p.723
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Fede
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Fede »

I've been away a good long while, for many and varied reasons.
But I've found for me, the best and most effective way to guard myself against wrong speech, is to put down everything I feel is worthy in response - then edit and delete the better and major part of it.
Keeps it short, sweet to the point and largely inoffensive.

Good morning, everyone.

:hug: :namaste:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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Ben
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Ben »

Hi Alex,
Its not only good but damned refreshing to see someone take responsibility for their experience here.
kind regards,

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

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retrofuturist
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by retrofuturist »

Good morning, Mrs. Fede.

Metta,
Retro. :)
"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
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Fede
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Fede »

We had an employee at work who used to regularly punctuate the day with long, drawn-out anecdotes about pretty much anything pointless.... so one day, I asked her politely, to consider first, of what use this information was to her, and then, of what possible use it might be to us.
"There is charm in silence, and wisdom in the unspoken word" I explained. (Don't ask me where that came from. I think I made it up, but doubtless it's re-worked from somewhere.)

Some time later, she approached me, and opened her mouth to speak...paused, then said, "You know, I just had something I wanted to tell you, but I realised how utterly pointless it is." And laughing, she walked away.

I think if we were to apply the same premise to everything we think of saying, it would be a lot quieter, over all......

Mouth and ears - use in proportion. Then use Mind to consider whether portion worth the effort.

Ok, I'm done.

:jumping:

PS: Good Morning Mr Retro.
Nice to see you again. :thumbsup:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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PeterB
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by PeterB »

Buon giorno Fede.. :hug:
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Fede
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Fede »

Ciao tesoro. Mi sei mancato. :)
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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PeterB
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by PeterB »

Fede wrote:Ciao tesoro. Mi sei mancato. :)
Mi sei mancata cosi tanto....Hows married life ?
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Fede
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Fede »

married life is ok.
After so long, getting used to a new surname is odd.... Like crossing your arms the opposite way....

Living with a newly-acquired 16-year-old step-son is a bigger learning curve..... :guns:

(Is being off-topic part of Wrong Speech?) :oops:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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PeterB
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by PeterB »

:smile: My fault... :focus:
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Fede
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Fede »

Actually, living with people who test your patience (and basically every precept you're trying to build your life on) is a pretty good environment for watching what comes out of your mouth.
Because everything that comes out of your mouth, has to come to Mind, first.
Wrong Speech doesn't begin with what we say.
It begins with what we think of saying.
That's where you have to know when to apply the brake.
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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Tex
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Tex »

While we, as Buddhists, strive to practice right speech ourselves, it might be just as beneficial to take others' wrong speech with as much equanimity as we can muster.

Life's too short to dwell on things we can't control anyway.
"To reach beyond fear and danger we must sharpen and widen our vision. We have to pierce through the deceptions that lull us into a comfortable complacency, to take a straight look down into the depths of our existence, without turning away uneasily or running after distractions." -- Bhikkhu Bodhi

"No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man." -- Heraclitus
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Kim OHara
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Re: Wrong speech on this forum

Post by Kim OHara »

Tex wrote:While we, as Buddhists, strive to practice right speech ourselves, it might be just as beneficial to take others' wrong speech with as much equanimity as we can muster.
Indeed. There's a 'Speech Blessing' meditation in the Vajrayana tradition which I have found useful. It includes:
Mindfulness gives me the power to control the use of my own speech
And the wisdom not to be adversely affected by other people's verbal abuse
By understanding it as expressions of their mental suffering.

When other people are unable to use their speech skillfully,
May I develop empathy to remain calm, focused and patient
So that they will be relieved of their suffering.
:namaste:
Kim
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