Could you all spare a thought.....

Casual discussion amongst spiritual friends.

Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Fede » Tue Apr 28, 2009 8:08 am

retrofuturist wrote:Greetings Fede,

Thanks for the update - good to hear that it's good news.

Metta,
Retro. :)


Thank you Retro...
Even better news this morning.,...
Called for my update, and mother called him the cantankerous old codger..... he's returning to normal...

Me (F): How is he today?
Mother (M): (aside to father) How are you today?
Father: Marvellous, simply marvellous!
F: He's a resilient feller, isn't he? Stubborn old bird....
M: Yes, he's a cantankerous old codger... I'm sure he plots these things to keep us on outr toes....
F: "Hmmmm let me think, everything is too quiet! What shall I do today? I know! I will cause my nether regions to explode!"
(Both mother and father laughed at this (Speaker phone) so it all looks more psoitive than it did a few days ago!

Mother has secured a supply of Folic Acid and is giving it to father. Results can only show improvement.

Thank you one and all for your heartfelt wishes.
I told my mother she had many of my dearest Dhamma friends 'rooting for them' and she called it "La communione dei Santi".
An italian term for many blessed people who pray for something for the good....

Blessed people, you all are.

:namaste:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Fede » Sun May 10, 2009 11:14 am

Hmmm....
Things have moved on since then, and things are not altogether well.... :(

An update:

Father has now been taken into hospital.
His bowel movements are still very loose although there is no blood, he cannot eat a single thing without an "accident" occurring virtually within minutes of his eating something.
He has been in all this week, but today and they have had him on a drip, to re-hydrate him.
Due to his medications his veins are far below the surface, so insertion is difficult and painful.
He keeps getting infections on the site of the needle entry, so they are treating him with antibiotics - but we all know what they do to your stomach and digestive process!
Today (Sunday 10th May) they are putting him on fluids only, but also giving him a powder (don't know if it is a barium meal) to make his insides easier to see and diagnose just what the problem may be. The tests take place tomorrow and my mother says the results will be immediately visible.

I will let you all know what is found.
Something isn't right.....

Just think on him. That's all... for an instant......

many thanks again.

:namaste:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby David N. Snyder » Sun May 10, 2009 4:53 pm

Sorry, just noticed this thread today . . . . much metta to you and your father and the rest of your family.
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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Mawkish1983 » Sun May 10, 2009 5:28 pm

:heart:
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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Fede » Sun May 10, 2009 7:40 pm

well, today he has been steadily taking in this revolting fluid in preparation for his tests tomorrow... during the day he had an asthma attack, and they administered oxygen and a cortisone injection...
What the man is going through....
Spoke to my mum tonight,.... she is spending the night at the hospital.
She went home with a friend and they brought back an armchair for her to sleep in.

My father says he's very much looking forward to our visit to Italy next month.

let us not say he has no fighting spirit.
I also managed to contact my elder brother at last.... he is now aware and up to date.... bit reclusive, is our bro'.....

Thank you for your kindness guys....I'll update as and when....
:namaste:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby retrofuturist » Sun May 10, 2009 11:51 pm

Best wishes to you and your family.

Metta,
Retro. :)
If you have asked me of the origination of unease, then I shall explain it to you in accordance with my understanding:
Whatever various forms of unease there are in the world, They originate founded in encumbering accumulation. (Pārāyanavagga)


Exalted in mind, just open and clearly aware, the recluse trained in the ways of the sages:
One who is such, calmed and ever mindful, He has no sorrows! -- Udana IV, 7


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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby zavk » Mon May 11, 2009 12:20 am

Fede wrote:My father says he's very much looking forward to our visit to Italy next month.

let us not say he has no fighting spirit.


:)

All the best.
With metta,
zavk
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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Fede » Tue May 19, 2009 2:43 pm

I am flying to Italy tomorrow (Wednesday 20th May) to visit my mother and father.
My mother is occasionally tearful and feels helpless.
My father is weakened and lethargic.

I am completely aware and resigned to the fact that this may be the last time I ever see him alive.
I am returning on Monday 25th (A bank holiday here in the UK).

I will touch base again then.
Whatever happens, happens.

:namaste:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby retrofuturist » Wed May 20, 2009 1:48 am

All the best, Fede.

Don't let anything be left unsaid, and don't forget the Salla Sutta.

Metta,
Retro. :)
If you have asked me of the origination of unease, then I shall explain it to you in accordance with my understanding:
Whatever various forms of unease there are in the world, They originate founded in encumbering accumulation. (Pārāyanavagga)


Exalted in mind, just open and clearly aware, the recluse trained in the ways of the sages:
One who is such, calmed and ever mindful, He has no sorrows! -- Udana IV, 7


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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Ben » Wed May 20, 2009 3:25 am

You and your family in my thoughts, Fede.
May the triple gem be your anchor.
Metta

Ben
Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.

Taṃ nadīhi vijānātha:
sobbhesu padaresu ca,
saṇantā yanti kusobbhā,
tuṇhīyanti mahodadhī.

Sutta Nipata 3.725

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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Ngawang Drolma. » Wed May 20, 2009 4:09 am

Fede wrote:I am flying to Italy tomorrow (Wednesday 20th May) to visit my mother and father.
My mother is occasionally tearful and feels helpless.
My father is weakened and lethargic.

I am completely aware and resigned to the fact that this may be the last time I ever see him alive.
I am returning on Monday 25th (A bank holiday here in the UK).

I will touch base again then.
Whatever happens, happens.

:namaste:


Fede,

I've dedicated much merit to you and yours. I'm so sorry to hear of his recent decline in health, I've been following this thread.
I hope your trip goes as well as it possibly can.

Best wishes,
Laura
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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby bukowski » Wed May 20, 2009 6:29 pm

I will dedicate merit for you and your family fede.

Much metta, bukowski.
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Update:

Postby Fede » Tue May 26, 2009 2:35 pm

There's a (less than tasteful) joke about a fantastic hog on a farm, who is faithful, loyal, an excellent 'guard-pig' and who offers invaluable service all round, on the farm.
One day, a neighbour notices he has a hind leg missing. He asks the farmer:
"What happened? Was he attacked? Did he have an accident?"
"No," replies the farmer, "We essentially bred him for food.... so we took the leg for lunch, but he's such a great pig, it seems a shame to get rid of him all at once....."

So here's the father update:

He had a stent inserted into one of the severely clogged coronary arteries, to give the heart a bit of 'leg-room'.... The situation, heart-wise has improved no end. he has regained colour, and is becoming kantankerous, which is a good sign!

However:
His kidneys are functioning at around 15%.
His colon is still producing very runny stools (although the situation seems to be improving - the medication they are giving him appears to be taking some effect, although I suspect it could be Portland cement in tablet form!)
They were going to send him home today. An absolutely ridiculous premise, because having been bed-bound since april 30th, he has now lost use of his legs.
Furthermore, my mother does not have the suitable equipment at home (proper clinical bed, standing frame, wheelchair, etc) although this is available on prescription. But it would take a week or so to supply and deliver.
It took 3 able-bodied young nurses to lift him from, and back into, bed.
At 77 years of age, there is absolutely no way my mother could cope doing this on her own.

However, they have now realised that due to his being bed-bound for so long, his prostate has enlarged to such an extent, that he can no longer pass water at all, without a catheter. And my mother is medically unequipped and inexperienced to be able to deal with this factor in a domestic environment. So it's possible they will transfer him to urology.....

Hence the 'pig' joke.
Bit by bit, he's losing his working parts. But all in all, my dad's a good 'pig'......


Will keep you posted.
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby BubbaBuddhist » Tue May 26, 2009 3:40 pm

May the road ahead be smooth and peaceful.

J
Author of Redneck Buddhism: or Will You Reincarnate as Your Own Cousin?
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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby christopher::: » Thu May 28, 2009 5:51 am

(((Fede))) That sounds very similar to what happened with my beloved grandfather. I'm keeping you all in my thoughts... and reading your story has now brought my grandfather into my mind as well. Life is precious, family is precious. But all of our individual lives have beginnings and ends...

:weep:
"As Buddhists, we should aim to develop relationships that are not predominated by grasping and clinging. Our relationships should be characterised by the brahmaviharas of metta (loving kindness), mudita (sympathetic joy), karuna (compassion), and upekkha (equanimity)."
~post by Ben, Jul 02, 2009
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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Fede » Mon Jun 01, 2009 3:00 pm

Thank you Christopher!

You see, there is no mustard seed available anywhere.... :smile:

Well, I just spoke to my parents, and you'll all be very glad to know that father has, for the first time since the end of April, stood up on his own.

Having been bed-bound for so long, his legs had simply refused to function, but with the exercises my mother has given him to do, and with her massage and therapy, it seems he's really come along .... well, if not in leaps and bounds, certainly a lot better than before.
She had considered putting him on a static exercise bike with a cable and dynamo, to save on electricity, but I think it may be a little while yet before he manages to go that well....
But things are definitely better.

They have a male nurse who visits daily, and apparently he and my father have struck up a good friendship.
It helps to have a good rapport.
he's quite strong, and takes the strain off my mum - in more ways than one.
Bless him....

I have taken to meditating upon dying and preparing myself for the inevitable, if for nothing more than being strong and supportive for my mother....
But he's obviously not ready to admit defeat yet!! Talk about live and kicking!! :lol:
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


http://www.armchairadvice.co.uk/relationships/forum/
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Re: Could you all spare a thought.....

Postby Guy » Mon Jun 01, 2009 5:34 pm

Your father is very fortunate to have many caring people in his life. You and your mother are clearly a strong support for him in his time of need. May you and your family be peaceful and content no matter what.

With Metta,

Guy
Four types of letting go:

1) Giving; expecting nothing back in return
2) Throwing things away
3) Contentment; wanting to be here, not wanting to be anywhere else
4) "Teflon Mind"; having a mind which doesn't accumulate things

- Ajahn Brahm
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