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I'm so depressed - Dhamma Wheel

I'm so depressed

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greggorious
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I'm so depressed

Postby greggorious » Sat Mar 10, 2012 10:26 pm

I've fallen back into a heavy depression again. I know there are some Buddhists who like to think of the hell realms as literal places, but to me it's the worst state of mind you can think of. I'm in the hell realms, and no matter how hard I try I can't get out. Doctors don't help, anti depressants don't help, the dharma hasn't helped.
"The original heart/mind shines like pure, clear water with the sweetest taste. But if the heart is pure, is our practice over? No, we must not cling even to this purity. We must go beyond all duality, all concepts, all bad, all good, all pure, all impure. We must go beyond self and nonself, beyond birth and death. When we see with the eye of wisdom, we know that the true Buddha is timeless, unborn, unrelated to any body, any history, any image. Buddha is the ground of all being, the realization of the truth of the unmoving mind.” Ajahn Chah

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Sam Vara
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Sam Vara » Sat Mar 10, 2012 10:58 pm

greggorious,

I'm really sorry to read your post, and hear that you are feeling so bad. I am hoping that it will pass quickly. Maybe the doctors and medication and the Dhamma have already helped a bit, but the results are not manifest yet. Keep trying if you can, and remember you are not alone in your suffering.

David2
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Location: Germany

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby David2 » Sun Mar 11, 2012 2:06 am


santa100
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby santa100 » Sun Mar 11, 2012 2:24 am

When you're down, don't just sit there and breathe the stale air in your room. Get out to the open sky and start moving: jogging, running, biking, whatever you like.. The fresh air not only will make your body feels good but also your mind..

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Ben
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Ben » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:56 am

“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

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ground
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby ground » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:58 am


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RMSmith
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Location: Northern Nevada

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby RMSmith » Sun Mar 11, 2012 2:52 pm

The depression will dissipate on its own, as long as you don't dwell on it. Its existence relies on being fed by attention. I was severely depressed for 4+ years recently. It slowly faded after a month or so, when I decided I was too tired to have it around anymore. I focused on other things and forgot all about it.
-----------
Rick



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bodom
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby bodom » Sun Mar 11, 2012 3:11 pm

To study is to know the texts,
To practice is to know your defilements,
To attain the goal is to know and let go.

- Ajahn Lee Dhammadharo


With mindfulness immersed in the body
well established, restrained
with regard to the six media of contact,
always centered, the monk
can know Unbinding for himself.

- Ud 3.5


https://www.dhammatalks.org/index.html
http://www.ajahnchah.org/

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Cittasanto
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Cittasanto » Sun Mar 11, 2012 3:32 pm



He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them.
But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side, if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion …
...
He must be able to hear them from persons who actually believe them … he must know them in their most plausible and persuasive form.

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Fede
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Location: The Heart of this "Green & Pleasant Land"...
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Fede » Sun Mar 11, 2012 4:12 pm

It's also worth considering gaining a 'second opinion'... a friend of mine nearly took his own life on more than one occasion, and was put onto several different meds.... but eventually his diagnosis was revised, confirmed and he was subsequently given the correct medication. Medication he was 'compatible' with, and which helped him....
The medication he had been given to date, actually made his condition much, much worse.....it was literally killing him - or making him wish he was dead.

Check it out with more than one professional.
sometimes, in matters of the brain, they're feeling their way too.....
"Samsara: The human condition's heartbreaking inability to sustain contentment." Elizabeth Gilbert, 'Eat, Pray, Love'.

Simplify: 17 into 1 WILL go: Mindfulness!

Quieta movere magna merces videbatur. (Sallust, c.86-c.35 BC)
Translation: Just to stir things up seemed a good reward in itself. ;)

I am sooooo happy - How on earth could I be otherwise?! :D


http://www.armchairadvice.co.uk/relationships/forum/

greggorious
Posts: 253
Joined: Thu Mar 24, 2011 6:40 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby greggorious » Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:13 pm

Thanks for your replies. It's always easy to reccomend that someone with depression go to see a doctor, be put on anti depressants, see a psychiatrist etc. To be honest I've lost all faith in doctors. In our capitalist society I've met too many doctors who are only too happy to just shove loads of pills down my throat. I've been on many different anti depressants over the past 15 years, and this is where it has got me, even more depressed than I was before. Meds just aren't an option for me anymore. This is why I became interested in Buddhism, and especially meditation, cos I want alternative ways to combat my "Mental illness". Usually the people who suggest meds are people who have never even been on them. They all have horrific side effects and I've had enough. I've been in therapy too for many years and have felt no progress at all.
"The original heart/mind shines like pure, clear water with the sweetest taste. But if the heart is pure, is our practice over? No, we must not cling even to this purity. We must go beyond all duality, all concepts, all bad, all good, all pure, all impure. We must go beyond self and nonself, beyond birth and death. When we see with the eye of wisdom, we know that the true Buddha is timeless, unborn, unrelated to any body, any history, any image. Buddha is the ground of all being, the realization of the truth of the unmoving mind.” Ajahn Chah

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Aloka
Posts: 5517
Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2009 2:51 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Aloka » Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:18 pm

Hi Greg,

I'm really sorry that you're not feeling so good. I don't know which country you live in, but it certainly might be worth asking your doctor if Mindfulness Based Cognitive Therapy is available to you (it includes meditation)

Here's some information for you at the link:



This is a BBC report from 2008 about it.




with kind wishes

Aloka

greggorious
Posts: 253
Joined: Thu Mar 24, 2011 6:40 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby greggorious » Sun Mar 11, 2012 5:24 pm

Thanks for the link. It's actually very near me, that centre, I'm from North London. I'm guessing it's a private practice charging lots of money though, and I'm unemployed.
"The original heart/mind shines like pure, clear water with the sweetest taste. But if the heart is pure, is our practice over? No, we must not cling even to this purity. We must go beyond all duality, all concepts, all bad, all good, all pure, all impure. We must go beyond self and nonself, beyond birth and death. When we see with the eye of wisdom, we know that the true Buddha is timeless, unborn, unrelated to any body, any history, any image. Buddha is the ground of all being, the realization of the truth of the unmoving mind.” Ajahn Chah

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Aloka
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Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2009 2:51 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Aloka » Sun Mar 11, 2012 6:28 pm


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Aloka
Posts: 5517
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Aloka » Sun Mar 11, 2012 6:47 pm

.

If you're unemployed Greg, why not try doing some voluntary work for a while until you can find a job ?

If you like animals, for example, animal rescue centres sometimes take on volunteers to help look after rescued animals at the centres, or NHS hospitals take voluntary workers to do various jobs. There are lots of things you could do to help others in some way.


.

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Bhikkhu Pesala
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Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2009 8:17 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Bhikkhu Pesala » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:02 pm

The cycle of depression is hard to get out of. I have had many people come to me over the years seeking some relief from their suffering.

Them: I am depressed. Will meditation help me?

Me: Yes, and listening to Dhamma talks, or reading inspiring Dhamma books.

Later: I am still depressed.

Me: You need to meditate more.

Them: I cannot meditate regularly. I'm depressed.

Me: :shrug: Please try harder.

I also suggest voluntary work, exercise, etc., but the problem is difficult to resolve.

In Buddhism, you really do have to work out your own salvation with diligence.
• • • • (Upasampadā: 24th June, 1979)

greggorious
Posts: 253
Joined: Thu Mar 24, 2011 6:40 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby greggorious » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:23 pm

The reason I find it so hard to meditate when I'm depressed, is not so much the act of doing it. I can easily get myself to meditate, it's the visions I have, it's like I enter a nightmare, a first class ticket into the hell realms.
"The original heart/mind shines like pure, clear water with the sweetest taste. But if the heart is pure, is our practice over? No, we must not cling even to this purity. We must go beyond all duality, all concepts, all bad, all good, all pure, all impure. We must go beyond self and nonself, beyond birth and death. When we see with the eye of wisdom, we know that the true Buddha is timeless, unborn, unrelated to any body, any history, any image. Buddha is the ground of all being, the realization of the truth of the unmoving mind.” Ajahn Chah

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Cittasanto
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Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Cittasanto » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:24 pm

hi greggorious
there are many councillors within the NHS who are trained in mindfulness based practices such as MBSR is only one method used although I think it would be hard not to find one who uses Mindfulness who has not done the MBSR or equivalent training as it is certified and recognised by universities and other medical centres, so carries allot of weight.

and what meditation are you doing? there are plenty of techneques out there and the one you are using is possibly not the right one for you at the moment!


He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them.
But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side, if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion …
...
He must be able to hear them from persons who actually believe them … he must know them in their most plausible and persuasive form.

greggorious
Posts: 253
Joined: Thu Mar 24, 2011 6:40 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby greggorious » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:28 pm

I try doing 15 minutes of breath concentration (Samatha I think?) in the morning and observation (Vipassana?) in the evening. Maybe I should just do breath concentration for now?
"The original heart/mind shines like pure, clear water with the sweetest taste. But if the heart is pure, is our practice over? No, we must not cling even to this purity. We must go beyond all duality, all concepts, all bad, all good, all pure, all impure. We must go beyond self and nonself, beyond birth and death. When we see with the eye of wisdom, we know that the true Buddha is timeless, unborn, unrelated to any body, any history, any image. Buddha is the ground of all being, the realization of the truth of the unmoving mind.” Ajahn Chah

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Bhikkhu Pesala
Posts: 3670
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2009 8:17 pm

Re: I'm so depressed

Postby Bhikkhu Pesala » Sun Mar 11, 2012 8:38 pm

Also try Buddhānussati and Mettabhāvanā.
• • • • (Upasampadā: 24th June, 1979)


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