Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

A discussion on all aspects of Theravāda Buddhism
Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:10 am

Firstly it needs to be said: I do not feel a 'Buddhist' baby naming or dedication ceremony makes any sense. I don't see there being any benefit.

My wife and I have been discussing some of the details about how we will raise our children. She isn't pregnant yet, were are just preparing for what will likely happen in the future. Despite not being a Christian, she wants our children to be Christened because she feels it is traditional. I have real reservations about it. The whole thing feel very false. She has said to me that if I can find a secular 'naming ceremony' or even a 'Buddhist' one she would be happy to go along with it. Does anyone know how I can compromise to keep with tradition but not be a hypocrite?

Thanks in advance.

User avatar
Ben
Posts: 18442
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:49 am
Location: kanamaluka

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Ben » Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:26 am

Hi Mawk,
Is your wife a Christian? If not, why the insistence on a christening?
It seems a bit bizarre.
Empty ritual and all that stuff.
kind regards,

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:35 am


User avatar
retrofuturist
Site Admin
Posts: 17855
Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:52 pm
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby retrofuturist » Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:38 am

Greetings Mawkish,

Not quite a naming ceremony, but what about one of these?

Not Theravadin, but not quite "empty" either...

Blessingway
http://www.bellybelly.com.au/pregnancy/ ... lessingway

Metta,
Retro. :)
"Do not force others, including children, by any means whatsoever, to adopt your views, whether by authority, threat, money, propaganda, or even education." - Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh

"The uprooting of identity is seen by the noble ones as pleasurable; but this contradicts what the whole world sees." (Snp 3.12)

"To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead" - Thomas Paine

User avatar
imagemarie
Posts: 420
Joined: Thu Feb 12, 2009 8:35 pm

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby imagemarie » Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:40 am

Hi Mawk

Quite by accident, I attended a baby naming ceremony at a vihara which serves the Sri Lankan community in my home town. I had asked the resident monk if I could call by with some requisites.
When I arrived, a couple with their new baby were about to have the monks perform the ceremony. No one else was in attendance. I was delighted to be invited to sit in with them. The "service" included a reading, some chanting (I recognised the Metta Sutta) and the joining of all participants (including the baby), with thread.
It was quite brief and there was much smiling and a relaxed communal vibe.
I don't know if this helps Mawk, but I'm not big on rites and rituals. It was a very pleasant occasion.

:namaste:

User avatar
Ben
Posts: 18442
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:49 am
Location: kanamaluka

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Ben » Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:43 am

No, that's ok.
I grew up in a staunch Catholic family. I have a distate for ritual for its own sake - or to give a respectable facade for an excuse to hit the grog.
Sometimes its best to pick your battles. And strategically concede defeat on issues which would only give you a Pyrrhic victory.
kind regards,

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 11:59 am


Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:02 pm


Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:05 pm


User avatar
Ben
Posts: 18442
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:49 am
Location: kanamaluka

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Ben » Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:19 pm

Hi Mawk,
I'm not advocating that you should lie!! Just pick your battles and compromise on stuff that;s not that important.
As far as bringing kids up in a (non)christian household...
You might be interested to know that we send our kids to an exclusive independent school that is aligned with one of the churches. And the reason we do that is because:
1. the school is one of the best in the country (academically)
2. we get a healthy discount on fees as a result of working for the school which makes it affordable.
3. the school's christian focus is very light.

There are a lot of kids at the school who come from non-christian families who send their kids to the school for the same reasons. There is no requirement that we should belong to the Presbyterian or Uniting Church for our kids to go to the school.
kind regards,

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:24 pm


Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:27 pm


User avatar
Ben
Posts: 18442
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:49 am
Location: kanamaluka

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Ben » Wed Apr 04, 2012 12:34 pm

“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 1:13 pm


User avatar
Ben
Posts: 18442
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:49 am
Location: kanamaluka

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Ben » Wed Apr 04, 2012 1:18 pm

Yeah, I did. i flew up to Sydney and attended the ceremony which was very relaxed.
I didn't actually recite some of the oaths that I was uncomfortable with. Fortunately with the structure of the ceremony nobody knew that I didnt recite some of the oaths. It was also worthwhile catching up with family members I hadn;t seen in years.
It worked out well.
kind regards,

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

Mawkish1983
Posts: 1286
Joined: Mon Jan 12, 2009 9:46 am
Location: Essex, UK

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Mawkish1983 » Wed Apr 04, 2012 1:40 pm


User avatar
Bhikkhu Pesala
Posts: 3670
Joined: Thu Jan 29, 2009 8:17 pm

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Bhikkhu Pesala » Wed Apr 04, 2012 2:51 pm

Ritualsl are only meaningless (to you) if you don't know the meaning behind them. So do some research of the texts or talk to some Asian Buddhists.

You can probably get a blessing quite easily at the Sri Lankan in Manchester, or the Burmese , or one of several other Buddhists centres in your area.

is a baby blessing performed by the Buddha and the Sangha, by reciting for his protection.
• • • • (Upasampadā: 24th June, 1979)

User avatar
Hickersonia
Posts: 264
Joined: Fri Jan 06, 2012 1:40 pm
Location: Cincinnati, OH
Contact:

Re: Baby naming, dedication ceremony?

Postby Hickersonia » Thu Apr 05, 2012 4:22 am

Hickersonia
http://hickersonia.wordpress.com/


"Holding on to anger is like grasping a hot coal with the intent of
throwing it at someone else; you are the one getting burned."


Return to “General Theravāda discussion”

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Faelig and 40 guests

Google Saffron, Theravada Search Engine