Then ask ourselves: "why did such a thing happen to YOU, not to someone else?"
-- "This is my karma. I must have treated others this way before and it’s now my turn to pay the debt. Don't fight back which will create new karma".
Also ask ourselves: "why are they treating you THIS way?"
-- "It's largely due to your own fault -- you didn't do what you should have done but did what you shouldn't have done: you irritated them by ..., you aggregated them by ..., YOU are actually responsible for it."
nameless wrote:cut for space...
"It's largely due to your own fault" is not a skilful way of thinking. I think lots of victims of bullying and abuse need to abandon exactly that sort of thinking.
starter wrote:Hi Friends,
Just would like to share with you the Buddha's teaching related to this topic:
"For in this world, hatred is never allayed by further acts of hatred. It is allayed by non-hatred. This is the fixed and ageless law. Those others do not realize that we should restrain ourselves, but those wise ones who realize this, at once end all their enimity."
I only remember this teaching is from a sutta about the big quarrel in the monastic community. Some friend might be able to provide the source.
Metta to all,
alan wrote:Was just re-reading MN8. Not sure of the meaning of "effacement". Several definitions are given in the notes, but none of them worked for me. Does anyone have a better understanding of the original word?
Sallekha (p. 699) [fr. saŋ+likh] austere penance, the higher life
pegembara wrote:"Others are cruel" because they do not know or see.
"We shall not be cruel" because we know and see.
"Bhikkhus, I declare [that there is] the extinction of āsavas in one who knows and sees, and not in one who does not know and see."
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .bpit.html
Āsavas that should be removed through forbearance wrote:24. "Bhikkhus! What are the āsavas that are to be removed through forbearance?
"Bhikkhus! In this Teaching, the bhikkhu, reflecting properly, can endure cold, heat, hunger, thirst, gadflies, mosquitoes, wind, heat of the sun, snakes, scorpions and lice. He can endure ill-spoken and unwholesome words. He has the nature of being able to endure severe, cruel, excruciatingly sharp, disagreeable, unpleasant, deadly and painful sensations which arise in the body.
"Bhikkhus! Āsavas and other destructive and burning defilements may arise in the bhikkhu who cannot endure such painful sensations. Those āsavas and other destructive and burning defilements do not arise in the bhikkhu who endures such painful sensations with proper reflection. Bhikkhus! These are called the āsavas that are to be removed through forbearance.
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