When a person is coming to the end of his life...

A forum for beginners and members of other Buddhist traditions to ask questions about Theravāda (The Way of the Elders). Responses require moderator approval before they are visible in order to double-check alignment to Theravāda orthodoxy.
M.Takoda
Posts: 6
Joined: Sun May 27, 2012 1:15 am

When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by M.Takoda »

A warm hello to everyone.

I have been pondering on these questions for the last few days.

According to the teachings found in Theravada Buddhism, Is there any way to mentally and emotionally prepare for death?

When a person is coming to the end of his life because of a terminal illness,is there any recommended meditations or sutta readings to help a person facing death?

Is there any way to ease a person’s mental suffering, for example when it comes to fearing death itself?


Kind Regards to all.

:namaste:

Mike
User avatar
retrofuturist
Posts: 27848
Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:52 pm
Location: Melbourne, Australia
Contact:

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by retrofuturist »

Greetings Mike,

Whilst it will be possible for people to give generic answers within a Theravadin perspective, I'd just like to clarify something with you first...

- Is this a real or upcoming situation you're facing? (or are you asking generally / hypothetically?)
- Assuming real, is the person in question Buddhist?

A dying person who is "born-and-bred" Theravadin, is likely to have different requirements (for want of a better word) than an atheist, a Christian, a Jain etc.

Metta,
Retro. :)
"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
M.Takoda
Posts: 6
Joined: Sun May 27, 2012 1:15 am

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by M.Takoda »

retrofuturist wrote: Is this a real or upcoming situation you're facing? (or are you asking generally / hypothetically?)
- Assuming real, is the person in question Buddhist?
Retro,

Sorry for not clarifying myself.

Fortunately Its not an upcoming situation, so you might say it is hypothetical.

In the case of a Buddhist, how does he prepare for death? Is there any suttas he might read or meditations to ease the mind and to avoid any fears and delusions?

With kind regards,

:anjali:

Mike
User avatar
Ben
Posts: 18438
Joined: Wed Dec 31, 2008 12:49 am
Location: kanamaluka

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by Ben »

Greetings M.Takoda,

Each year I give a talk to the students at the christian school where I work on the Buddhist perspective on death and dying.
One year, as part of my talk, I presented a letter that Ajahn Chah wrote to an elderly English disciple who was dying.
Living with the Cobra: http://www.ajahnchah.org/book/Living_With_Cobra1.php" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

And there are, of course, many discourses in the suttas and commentarial literature on the subject of death, the recollections of death, and its inevitable approach.
kind regards,

Ben
“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

Compassionate Hands Foundation (Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • Buddhist Global ReliefUNHCR

e: [email protected]..
pegembara
Posts: 3465
Joined: Tue Oct 13, 2009 8:39 am

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by pegembara »

Our Real Home
A Talk to an Aging Lay Disciple Approaching Death
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/lib/thai/chah/bl111.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;


And
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .than.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

Regards
And what is right speech? Abstaining from lying, from divisive speech, from abusive speech, & from idle chatter: This is called right speech.
ringo
Posts: 28
Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2011 7:13 pm

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by ringo »

Hello,

Here (http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .than.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;) is the beautiful Anathapindikovada Sutta - instructions from Venerable Sariputta to a dying Anathapindika. This Sutta touches me every time I read it.

Regards,
User avatar
marc108
Posts: 463
Joined: Wed Jan 18, 2012 10:10 pm

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by marc108 »

Beyond Coping: A Study Guide on Aging, Illness, Death, & Separation
http://dhammatalks.org/ebook_index.html#beyond_coping" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;

A Refuge from Death. - A collection of 20 Dhamma talks, chants, sutta readings and guided meditations for listening as one approaches death.
http://dhammatalks.org/mp3_collections_index.html#death" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
"It's easy for us to connect with what's wrong with us... and not so easy to feel into, or to allow us, to connect with what's right and what's good in us."
Kenshou
Posts: 1030
Joined: Sun Nov 15, 2009 12:03 am
Location: Minneapolis, MN

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by Kenshou »

Ben wrote: http://www.ajahnchah.org/book/Living_With_Cobra1.php" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
This is a very good little talk, how have I missed this? A deceptively large amount of wisdom in that short letter.
ringo
Posts: 28
Joined: Sun Jul 03, 2011 7:13 pm

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by ringo »

Here's a 'charm' which might help cultivate calmness, serenity, ease etc.
I have good will for footless beings,
good will for two-footed beings,
good will for four-footed beings,
good will for many-footed beings.

May footless beings do me no harm.
May two-footed beings do me no harm.
May four-footed beings do me no harm.
May many-footed beings do me no harm.

May all creatures,
all breathing things,
all beings
— each & every one —
meet with good fortune.
May none of them come to any evil.

Limitless is the Buddha,
limitless the Dhamma,
limitless the Sangha.
There is a limit to creeping things: snakes, scorpions,
centipedes, spiders, lizards, & rats.
I have made this safeguard,
I have made this protection.
May the beings depart.
I pay homage to the Blessed One, homage to the seven rightly self-awakened ones.
From: http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .piya.html" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
User avatar
Son
Posts: 89
Joined: Wed Jan 19, 2011 3:58 am

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by Son »

All beings pass away. Dying comes equally with being born; this is something that anyone, religious, non-religious, or Buddhist alike, should contemplate deeply before dying. Dying is an intense experience, and as we pass into a successive existence, the experiences are normally overwhelming. The most important thing is that they are not apathetic toward their death. The must have compassion for themselves, and they should rely on loving kindness for everyone around them. They shouldn't be plagued with questions, or undergo some religious upheaval where they "find god" or something like that. They should be as calm as possible. No amount of radical thinking is going to help them, it's not going to change the life they've lived or improve their state of mind as they experience dying. Another critical factor, truly, is that they should focus on the merit of their past good actions, their own essential virtue in other words. This is invaluable in death. Also, positiveness and happiness within the dying and the people around them is very important.
From this we can see how important it is to develop a happy and virtuous state of mind at the time of death. We can also see how we can be of great benefit to others when they are dying, by encouraging them to develop a positive mind and creating for them conditions that will help them to generate good thoughts. In this way we can bring measureless benefit to our friends and relatives, even if they have no interest in Dharma.
A seed sleeps in soil.
It's cold and alone, hopeless.
Until it blooms above.
User avatar
Bunjers
Posts: 22
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 7:36 am
Location: S. Wales, U.K.
Contact:

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by Bunjers »

Discussion about death with Ayya Khema
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pLugPA2O ... F4C7DFAA11" onclick="window.open(this.href);return false;
Gāravo ca nivāto ca, Santutthi ca kataññutā, Kālena dhammasavanam, Etam mangalamuttamam :anjali:
starter
Posts: 938
Joined: Mon Jul 12, 2010 9:56 pm

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by starter »

AN 4.184
PTS: A ii 173
Abhaya Sutta: Fearless
translated from the Pali by
Thanissaro Bhikkhu
...

"And who is the person who, subject to death, is not afraid or in terror of death?

"There is the case of the person who has abandoned passion, desire, fondness, thirst, fever, and craving for sensuality. Then he comes down with a serious disease. As he comes down with a serious disease, the thought does not occur to him, 'O, those beloved sensual pleasures will be taken from me, and I will be taken from them!' He does not grieve, is not tormented; does not weep, beat his breast, or grow delirious. This is a person who, subject to death, is not afraid or in terror of death.

"Furthermore, there is the case of the person who has abandoned passion, desire, fondness, thirst, fever, and craving for the body. Then he comes down with a serious disease. As he comes down with a serious disease, the thought does not occur to him, 'O, my beloved body will be taken from me, and I will be taken from my body!' He does not grieve, is not tormented; does not weep, beat his breast, or grow delirious. This, too, is a person who, subject to death, is not afraid or in terror of death.

"Furthermore, there is the case of the person who has done what is good, has done what is skillful, has given protection to those in fear, and has not done what is evil, savage, or cruel. Then he comes down with a serious disease. As he comes down with a serious disease, the thought occurs to him, 'I have done what is good, have done what is skillful, have given protection to those in fear, and I have not done what is evil, savage, or cruel. To the extent that there is a destination for those who have done what is good, what is skillful, have given protection to those in fear, and have not done what is evil, savage, or cruel, that's where I'm headed after death.' He does not grieve, is not tormented; does not weep, beat his breast, or grow delirious. This, too, is a person who, subject to death, is not afraid or in terror of death.

"Furthermore, there is the case of the person who has no doubt or perplexity, who has arrived at certainty with regard to the True Dhamma. Then he comes down with a serious disease. As he comes down with a serious disease, the thought occurs to him, 'I have no doubt or perplexity. I have arrived at certainty with regard to the True Dhamma.' He does not grieve, is not tormented; does not weep, beat his breast, or grow delirious. This, too, is a person who, subject to death, is not afraid or in terror of death.

"These, brahman, are four people who, subject to death, are not afraid or in terror of death."

May we all arrive at the true Dhamma and become fearless. Metta to all,

Starter
User avatar
waimengwan
Posts: 159
Joined: Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:22 am

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by waimengwan »

It is very important to keep them happy and have a calm mind and to get them to think of virtuous things, their teachers, dharma work etc etc.
I was reading the Lamrim and there is this thing called 'Throwing Karma' is one's last thoughts, if it is virtuous then one will go to a good rebirth and it is is not then the converse will happen.
User avatar
manas
Posts: 2678
Joined: Thu Jul 22, 2010 3:04 am
Location: Melbourne, Australia

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by manas »

I think it is good to think about & prepare for this eventuality. I have decided that if I were in a situation where death was impending in a very short space of time, that I would take refuge in mindfulness of the body. If able to do so with a calm mind, to observe the rising and falling of the breath to it's actual cessation for this current body - ie, the final exhalation - would be a wonderful meditation, if it could be done in the right frame of mind. But if my mind was afraid, I would focus more on my faith & conviction in the Buddha, Dhamma and Sangha in the final moments, to steady & calm the mind.

:anjali:
To the Buddha-refuge i go; to the Dhamma-refuge i go; to the Sangha-refuge i go.
User avatar
waimengwan
Posts: 159
Joined: Thu Jul 12, 2012 2:22 am

Re: When a person is coming to the end of his life...

Post by waimengwan »

Yes this trigger a teaching that Rinpoche gave us about why we should start early in our life to do dharma or engage in dharma activities. As if we spent 50 years for most people, just doing samsaric things and worldly stuff, our last thought will most likely be related to delusions and not virtuous thoughts. Plus the fact that if we wait till we are retired either we might get there or at that age we dont have the energy to engage in dharma properly and after 50 years of habituations of not engaging in dharma why would our mind suddenly shift? That mind shift towards dharma will be hard to after so many years of habituations.
Post Reply