Dhamma help for love sickness.

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Dhamma help for love sickness.

Postby uvm49erfan » Mon Jul 30, 2012 11:54 pm

To simplify a long story, I am in mutual love with this girl, but because circumstances, we have to wait to be with one another. This girl has been my best friend for 4 years now and want to try out a relationship with one another after each having gone our own ways and always coming back to each other as close as when we left.

I have for the last few years been a closest Buddhist, but have got into it fully over the last few months. Do any of you have any suggests, or meditations to ease the pain that comes with the attachment of love, more specifically, love that can not yet be expressed? Thanks in advance.

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Re: Dhamma help for love sickness.

Postby jonno » Tue Jul 31, 2012 5:50 am

Dear friend, as you and your friend are as you say "already in mutual love", you are in a sense already together. The fact that you are not yet physically together does not alter or diminish that love.I understand the anguish you are feeling but real love can not be separated or damaged by physical distance ,that is only yearning and illusion.I find that true love knows no boundaries and that the one that I love exists within me and I in her so ther is no separation . Try and let that love spill out to encompass all beings, after all love is infinite and not limited to one person.If you give that love to others it will be returned a thousandfold.be patient my friend time is only an illusion after all. love Jonno

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Re: Dhamma help for love sickness.

Postby yawares » Tue Jul 31, 2012 2:56 pm

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Re: Dhamma help for love sickness.

Postby Cittasanto » Tue Jul 31, 2012 5:50 pm

He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them.
But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side, if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion …
He must be able to hear them from persons who actually believe them … he must know them in their most plausible and persuasive form.

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Re: Dhamma help for love sickness.

Postby Caraka » Wed Aug 01, 2012 10:51 am

Separation from whom you love is Dhukka, and now that your conditions has fruited into a love attachment you are forced to let it play out. Just be aware of what your mind choose to do, and learn. Cause there will be choices to be made related to your love commitment.

Thats all I can say about this now. Cause I also struggle with fruits from such love conditions. I only hope, to one day be free from this inversion we call 'inlove'.


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Re: Dhamma help for love sickness.

Postby waimengwan » Wed Aug 01, 2012 4:35 pm

I know a friend who married his best friend it was a disaster. But it may not need to turn out that way. being in love or having a relationship is not the holy grail for happiness. That does not mean we should have it but have it with the right view that the best of relationships may not last actually. And some times being in a relationship creates more pain than happiness.

Will we feel so love sick in 5 years time after we have known our partner, only time will tell.

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Re: Dhamma help for love sickness.

Postby uvm49erfan » Fri Aug 03, 2012 5:15 am

Thanks for all the replies and help.

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