I would like to ask you some question about one situation.
Since 1 or 2 years I preparing myself to ordination, 1 meal a day etc etc. My mother seems to be agree.
But this weekand, when i come to my family, my mother and brother, before i leaving, i see my mother crying, she said me that all time (twice a mounth) when i leave the familial home, she cryes. She cryes because she feel very peacefull when i am near, and she said that my brother missing me to...
She tell me that she dont know how the family will leave if i go forth, if i will ordain, and sje said me that if i want i can still at home, live a bhikkhu life or everythink that i want to do ! But just be near to family...
So i would like to ask you what is better for practice and harmony:
- to ordain in a monastery, not be disturbed by internet, world news, and other, live a very simple life; but see my family suffering
- to ordain (or not ordain but live a bhikkhu live, guided by patimokkha) and live at home, in city, on the bad of my family, have a risk to be disturbed by internet, world news, modern peoples and friends incomprehention, critucising etc etc; but practicing solo on my own and see my family in peace.
Personaly i dont know how to do.
-I know that in monastery my practice will be more complet, and i feel guilty that i dont feel sad when my mother cryes
-but i know that my mother offered me the best life, so i cant allow to myself to let my familly alone, but i know that the practice can be disturbed and influenced, also i dont want become a "propriety" of my mothers ego...
Monastic Bhikkhu or "Home Bhikkhu", it's a noun of this topic.
Last edited by DAWN
on Sun Sep 09, 2012 11:44 am, edited 1 time in total.
Sabbe dhamma anatta
We are not concurents...