if you could ask the Buddha one question

A discussion on all aspects of Theravāda Buddhism
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Jechbi
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Re: if you could ask the Buddha one question

Post by Jechbi »

Hello Peter,
Peter wrote:Perhaps you could clarify? Show me the difference between what you wrote and what I wrote?
The difference is that I was trying to respond to the OP by describing what would be, for me personally, the best question. I thought I made that very clear. You responded as if I was saying that the question would be the best for everyone. So unfortunately you read my post in a way that was not intended. You told me that my response was "empty and hollow," and I have to admit I was caught by surprise by this, because I was just being honest about what I felt would be the best question for me. Why is my honest question empty and hollow? I took it personally, which I shouldn't have done.

But I also tried to clarify by posting in this thread:
Jechbi wrote:I was talking about myelf, not you.
By this time, the tone of my posts may have conveyed to you that I was feeling hurt and personally attacked. Nevertheless, you persisted in telling me that my understanding of the Buddha's teachings was flawed, and that I lacked humility and was not open to learning. All of these things struck me as personal attacks.

I told you in another post that I felt you had personally attacked me. You alerted the moderators, and at your request, that post was deleted in its entirety from this thread. Part of that post contained this:
Jechbi (from deleted post) wrote:
Peter wrote:In short, a] an offer of generosity is indeed taught to be good, but it is not taught to be the best and b] to ask a Buddha how one might work towards Nibbana is not taught to be selfish, but rather is taught to be the best. To think generosity is the best or that to strive for Nibbana is selfish seems to me to show misunderstanding of the teachings, misunderstandings I felt worthwhile to point out and correct.
I didn't say any of those things. None of those things were my point.
I also sent you a PM trying to point out to you that you misunderstood my posts. Despite these efforts to clarify this matter for you, you have persisted in confronting me with regard to what I wrote. I have felt throughout this discussion as if I have been on the defensive. I didn't post here in order to get a lesson from you, Peter, on how wrong you believe my understanding is of the Buddha's teachings, and how lacking in humility you feel I am, and how closed to learning you feel I am, and how empty and hollow you feel my question would be.

Let me try to be very clear: You wrote this:
Peter wrote:What is objectionable is to say that asking the Buddha what he needs is the best question on could ask and that asking a question related to one's personal practice is selfish.
My response is this: There is no question with regard to personal practice that urgently comes to mind for me. Why would I waste my time asking the Buddha questions that I don't have? (Which is not to say I have nothing to learn. I just think the Buddha would be pretty good at knowing how to instruct me in practice, so much so that I don't have to struggle for questions.) The best question for me is the one that I truly believe I would ask, as I noted earlier: Either "Would you take me as your disciple," or "How can I help?"

I've already explained this to you several times in language that is as clear as I'm capable of using, yet you persist in saying that my personal observation is objectionable.

I wish you would stop telling me that the best question for me would be objectionable. I wish you would stop telling me that I do not understand the Buddha's teachings. I wish you would stop telling me that my question would be hollow and empty. I wish you would stop telling me that I lack humility and that I am not open to learning.

I wish you could accept that for me, this is the best question. I wish you could simply listen to my contribution without trying to tear it to shreds.

Peter, I'm going to try to respond to you in the future as if this exchange didn't happen. You can help me by being sensitive to how I feel about what has occurred here. And to the extent that you feel personally affronted by how I've engaged in this discussion, I apologize and take responsibility for my role in that.
Rain soddens what is kept wrapped up,
But never soddens what is open;
Uncover, then, what is concealed,
Lest it be soddened by the rain.
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Jechbi
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Re: if you could ask the Buddha one question

Post by Jechbi »

Actually, this is the best question:
imagemarie wrote:Er..I'd hold up a flower. Am I on the wrong forum ? :jumping:













kidding ;)
Rain soddens what is kept wrapped up,
But never soddens what is open;
Uncover, then, what is concealed,
Lest it be soddened by the rain.
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Spiny O'Norman
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Re: if you could ask the Buddha one question

Post by Spiny O'Norman »

I would ask Buddha:
"Where have you been all this time?" :alien:

Do I win a prize? :jumping:

Rick
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kc2dpt
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Re: if you could ask the Buddha one question

Post by kc2dpt »

Jechbi wrote:The difference is that I was trying to respond to the OP by describing what would be, for me personally, the best question. I thought I made that very clear.
No not really. What you said what "I think that's the best question possible." It was this statement, making a judgement of what would be best for everybody, that prompted me to respond. If you had said "I think that's the best question possible for me based on where I'm at in my practice" or something like that then I likely would have not felt any need to respond. Even "I like this question" would have been innocuous.
Jechbi wrote:You responded as if I was saying that the question would be the best for everyone. So unfortunately you read my post in a way that was not intended.
My mistake.
Jechbi wrote:You told me that my response was "empty and hollow,"
Actually, I said Kare's response was empty and hollow. But I can see I perhaps wasn't clear about this. I apologize.
Jechbi wrote:Why is my honest question empty and hollow?
Kare's question seemed to me empty and hollow because one cannot help a Buddha. A Buddha has gone beyond the need for help. Of course I am speaking from a teachings perspective. A Buddha still needs the four requisites. Which brings me to your point about generosity, and my point that while generosity is praiseworthy, it is not taught be the Buddha to be the best. Nevertheless, I realized last night that while it might not be the best in a general sense, it will be the best for certain people based on where they are in their practice. Which brings us back around to...
Jechbi wrote:But I also tried to clarify by posting in this thread:
Jechbi wrote:I was talking about myelf, not you.
By this time, the tone of my posts may have conveyed to you that I was feeling hurt and personally attacked. Nevertheless, you persisted in telling me that my understanding of the Buddha's teachings was flawed
I was wrong to say this implies a lack of understanding the Buddha's teachings. One may understand the limits of generosity and yet still feel that is where they want to direct their efforts. There is nothing wrong with that; this is something I tend to forget. Again, I apologize.
All of these things struck me as personal attacks.
It is not a personal attack to tell someone their post regarding the teachings displays a misunderstanding. That you took it as a personal attack is likely because you meant to say "this is best for me" but I took it as "this is what the Buddha teaches as best".
Jechbi wrote:Let me try to be very clear: You wrote this:
Peter wrote:What is objectionable is to say that asking the Buddha what he needs is the best question on could ask and that asking a question related to one's personal practice is selfish.
My response is this: There is no question with regard to personal practice that urgently comes to mind for me. Why would I waste my time asking the Buddha questions that I don't have? (Which is not to say I have nothing to learn. I just think the Buddha would be pretty good at knowing how to instruct me in practice, so much so that I don't have to struggle for questions.)
When you first said this a few days ago I conceded it was a good point. I still think it is a good point.
- Peter

Be heedful and you will accomplish your goal.
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kc2dpt
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Re: if you could ask the Buddha one question

Post by kc2dpt »

Jechbi wrote:Actually, this is the best question:
imagemarie wrote:Er..I'd hold up a flower. Am I on the wrong forum ? :jumping:
Oh please, everyone know the best question is "What do you get if you multiply six by nine?"
- Peter

Be heedful and you will accomplish your goal.
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tiltbillings
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Re: if you could ask the Buddha one question

Post by tiltbillings »

Gentlemen, play nice.
>> Do you see a man wise [enlightened/ariya] in his own eyes? There is more hope for a fool than for him.<< -- Proverbs 26:12

This being is bound to samsara, kamma is his means for going beyond. -- SN I, 38.

“Of course it is happening inside your head, Harry, but why on earth should that mean that it is not real?” HPatDH p.723
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Jechbi
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Re: if you could ask the Buddha one question

Post by Jechbi »

Thanks, Peter.
Peter wrote:
Jechbi wrote:The difference is that I was trying to respond to the OP by describing what would be, for me personally, the best question. I thought I made that very clear.
No not really. What you said what "I think that's the best question possible." It was this statement, making a judgement of what would be best for everybody, that prompted me to respond. If you had said "I think that's the best question possible for me based on where I'm at in my practice" or something like that then I likely would have not felt any need to respond. Even "I like this question" would have been innocuous.
Well, I was trying to answer the question in the OP, which was (emphasis mine): "if you could ask the Buddha one question, what would it be?" So I was only answering with regard to myself because that's what was asked.

You are correct, though, that at the moment I answered, I thought it was a pretty good question for just about anyone to ask, but even at that moment, I don't think I would have said it's the best question for everybody. The only reason it's the best possible for me is that other questions I might have about practice etc. have been thoroughly answered in discussions here on this forum as well as in my talks with teachers and in what I've read elsewhere. Every time I ask a question about practice these days, I get an answer that I already know. So, if given the opportunity, I'd rather leave the Buddha at the steering wheel when it comes to practical instruction.

Regardless, I appreciate the other members' patience throughout this discussion. It has been, of course, mostly about ego. Actually, a good (though painful) lesson for me overall, and I hope for you as well, Peter.
Peter wrote:
Jechbi wrote:Actually, this is the best question:
imagemarie wrote:Er..I'd hold up a flower. Am I on the wrong forum ? :jumping:
Oh please, everyone know the best question is "What do you get if you multiply six by nine?"
And the best answer is (drumroll) .... 42.

:anjali:
Rain soddens what is kept wrapped up,
But never soddens what is open;
Uncover, then, what is concealed,
Lest it be soddened by the rain.
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