Insight Meditation – parts of the body, i am having difficulties
I have read this http://www.buddhanet.net/m_part1.htm along with other material and Dhamma talks (thanks Reflection) and it has been very useful to me. The one thing that cause me a problem at this stage in my development relates to where the Venerable Mahasi Sayadaw said:
"Thirdly, reflect upon the repulsive nature of the body to assist you in diminishing the unwholesome attachment that so many people have for the body. Dwell on some of its impurities, such as stomach, intestines, phlegm, pus, blood. Ponder on these impurities so that the absurd fondness for the body may be eliminated.
The fourth protection for your psychological benefit is to reflect on the phenomenon of ever-approaching death. Buddhist teachings stress that life is uncertain, but death is certain; life is precarious but death is sure. Life has death as its goal. There is birth, disease, suffering, old age, and eventually, death. These are all aspects of the process of existence."
The problem I find is that it feels too easy because I know this is the truth – as in as night follows day so day will follow night. It is not that I am claiming any development; rather that is the reality that I see every hour of every day that I work. To explain I work in a nursing home and look after elderly people who have high care needs – basically they are living out their last days. Some last a few years, some only a matter of hours but sickness and death come to all of them as it will come to me. While I like to think that I look after the residents with care, compassion and understanding; the degeneration of the body and the pain is something I note, try to mitigate but it does not cause me to be repulsed because I know that the man/woman is not that body, the body is just something that I attend to while looking after the “person”.
Should I just accept that this is the way that it is, am I missing something, should I just omit meditation of the 32 parts of the body.
Sorry about the poor explanation but if anyone can give me any assistance I would be most grateful.