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Eradicating sex drive - Page 2 - Dhamma Wheel

Eradicating sex drive

Buddhist ethical conduct including the Five Precepts (Pañcasikkhāpada), and Eightfold Ethical Conduct (Aṭṭhasīla).
santa100
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby santa100 » Sun Oct 27, 2013 4:13 pm

There're different levels of happiness. The higher the level, the more subtle, long-lasting, and peaceful. Good entertaintment, fine living, hobbies, companionship, etc. sure brings happiness. But obviously this level of happiness stops when these things are gone or worse, turning against one! Cultivating virtues, practicing meditation, contemplating the Buddha's teachings might be difficult at the beginning but they bring one to higher, more blissful and long-lasting levels of happiness. Eventually it will culminate in the highest kind of happiness which is Nibbana.

Sanjay PS
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby Sanjay PS » Sun Oct 27, 2013 4:24 pm

The Path of Dhamma

The path of Dhamma is no picnic . It is a strenuous march steeply up the hill . If all the comrades desert you , Walk alone ! Walk alone ! with all the Thrill !!

U S.N. Goenka

NotQuiteSure
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby NotQuiteSure » Sun Oct 27, 2013 6:37 pm


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BubbaBuddhist
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby BubbaBuddhist » Mon Oct 28, 2013 5:36 pm

:namaste:
Author of Redneck Buddhism: or Will You Reincarnate as Your Own Cousin?

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reflection
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby reflection » Mon Oct 28, 2013 7:47 pm

Body follows mind on this matter.

I wish you much luck abstaining for as long as you see fit. Please know that you are not the only one finding a way. I'm also trying not to engage in any sexual activities till I go on a year long retreat soonish. Of course, over there (and after) I plan to keep with it, but the environment there is more fit to it so I know it'll be easier.

I hope it'll work out for you. From quite some years of on and off struggling I can say it is not so easy, and there is no single trick for it. But if you keep with it, you will make progress and it will become easier and easier. It is worth it, I already notice so much peace. I don't know if I'll ever totally eradicate the sex drive in this life -to me this seems unlikely- but I'm happy with every little bit of decrease. That's why I previously said to take it day by day.

I suggest reading the sutta MN20. The five tactics mentioned there are very good to work with desires when they come up.

One more piece of advice, if you don't make it till the end of the year, don't be mad but just start over again. If you learn from your mistakes then each time it'll be harder to fall. Be prepared to find and fight some inner demons. Maybe especially because you are young like me (I'm 26).

Hope this helps in any way.

With metta,
Reflection

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Mindstar
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby Mindstar » Tue Oct 29, 2013 9:34 am

I´m also in a process to eradicate the sex drive simply because its a type of pleasure that really can corrupt the mind a lot. The more you indulge in it the stronger grows the craving for it. In addition it seems to be so primitive and so short lasting, not really worth it. Because of these perceptions i think i will be successful in the end.

What is however much more troubling to me is the emotional lacks and cravings in regard to women. I must have really delighted in women in my past lives to have such a strong underlying tendency to that type of craving. Maybe you could call it the craving for the delight in the exchange of metta energy (or "falling in love").

It is however not that much different to sexual craving as it has also arisen on pleasurable sense contact that creates a strong inner feeling of happiness and because of that is able to corrupt the mind and leads to attachment. That craving is also supported by states of mental sufferings that strengthen the underlying tendencies of the mind towards pleasurable objects (women).

The strongest weapon against that corruption is mindfulness in the moment. Because there are cute women at my working place i have daily practice what will surely prove to be very helpful to me in the future. Oh and i`m young too -> 28 ;)
Last edited by Mindstar on Tue Oct 29, 2013 9:56 am, edited 1 time in total.

Higher than lordship over all earth,
Higher than sojourning in heavens supreme,
Higher than empire over all the worlds,
Is Fruit of Entrance to the Dhamma Stream.
—Dhammapada

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tiltbillings
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby tiltbillings » Tue Oct 29, 2013 9:52 am


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Mindstar
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby Mindstar » Tue Oct 29, 2013 10:21 am


Higher than lordship over all earth,
Higher than sojourning in heavens supreme,
Higher than empire over all the worlds,
Is Fruit of Entrance to the Dhamma Stream.
—Dhammapada

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zerotime
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby zerotime » Tue Oct 29, 2013 10:59 pm

there is a commentary from Mahasi Sayadaw on Culavedalla Sutta. Visakha the layman was attached to sex when he was a sotapanna until he reached anagami. Then, after two days without going to bed, his wife force him to give some explanation:

"Listen, Dhammadeinna. I have attained Lokottaa Dhamma (spiritual attainment transcending the world) that would shape my future, after I have heard the Buddha’s sermon. On the first and second occasions when I achieved the Dhamma, I was not yet completely free from the feelings connected with sensual pleasures, and, therefore, at that time our marital relationship had not yet changed. Now on this third occasion, the Dhamma which I have gained is immensely peculiar and surprising."

M.Sayadaw - (p.6,7) http://www.yellowrobe.com/images/librar ... 0SUTTA.pdf

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mikenz66
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby mikenz66 » Tue Oct 29, 2013 11:11 pm

Hi Zerotime,

That's an interesting commentary. The version here: http://aimwell.org/culavedalla.html is a little more readable.

:anjali:
Mike

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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby Samma » Wed Oct 30, 2013 4:31 am


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manas
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby manas » Wed Oct 30, 2013 4:54 am

Whenever I see the title of this topic, I think of this

Image

Seriously, this idea that we can somehow just 'eradicate' sex desire, something so ingrained in our nature that it doesn't totally disappear until the anagami stage - which most of us, if we are honest with ourselves, will probably not reach in this lifetime - misses the mark, imho. I think the focus should be less on 'eradication' and more on 'applying mindfulness and wisdom in dealing with it' - cos it's going to be around for a while.

metta
Then the Blessed One, picking up a tiny bit of dust with the tip of his fingernail, said to the monk, "There isn't even this much form...feeling...
perception...fabrications...consciousness that is constant, lasting, eternal, not subject to change, that will stay just as it is as long as eternity."

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manas
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby manas » Wed Oct 30, 2013 5:13 am

Then the Blessed One, picking up a tiny bit of dust with the tip of his fingernail, said to the monk, "There isn't even this much form...feeling...
perception...fabrications...consciousness that is constant, lasting, eternal, not subject to change, that will stay just as it is as long as eternity."

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Dhammanando
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby Dhammanando » Wed Oct 30, 2013 7:23 am


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tiltbillings
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby tiltbillings » Wed Oct 30, 2013 7:32 am


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BubbaBuddhist
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby BubbaBuddhist » Wed Oct 30, 2013 12:46 pm

Author of Redneck Buddhism: or Will You Reincarnate as Your Own Cousin?

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daverupa
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby daverupa » Wed Oct 30, 2013 2:09 pm


Samma
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby Samma » Wed Oct 30, 2013 6:17 pm

Not being an offense, I assumed they had them, and it was not a big deal.
But sure, in the end I guess the facts are unclear...
Any sources?
brian ruhe talks about how this was part of what cased the split.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yj7aOCB_oaA
Others believed they had not eradicated all the demons so arahants were still doing it or somesuch.

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manas
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby manas » Wed Oct 30, 2013 8:21 pm

Then the Blessed One, picking up a tiny bit of dust with the tip of his fingernail, said to the monk, "There isn't even this much form...feeling...
perception...fabrications...consciousness that is constant, lasting, eternal, not subject to change, that will stay just as it is as long as eternity."

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kmath
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Re: Eradicating sex drive

Postby kmath » Wed Oct 30, 2013 10:22 pm



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