I have had a series of experiences that seem to have Buddhist elements, so I thought I'd
see if anyone on this board might agree or disagree with my interpretations. The first experience is
walking down a street and suddenly having a powerful sense that life had somehow shifted into reverse,
in that my usual sense of operating under my own power was replaced with a sense of all of us being drawn
along by some all powerful 'tractror beam' of which we were all unaware.
This experience began to make more sense after my second experience. I was driving on the freeway
when I suddenly went into 'samadhi'--in the literal sense of the candle of consciousness suddenly being
blown out. In this nothingness a thought bubble appeared that read, 'This doesn't seem safe' and the
'I' popped back. I then heard a voice that said, 'Your intention that this be safe will make it safe' and
the samadhi state returned. When the 'I' reappeared I was still driving as if nothing had changed.
The thought then occurred to me that the 'I' is just some ghost in the machine, and it is always the
universe 'behind the wheel' so to speak.
That experience took me 'beyond' and the next one 'beyond the beyond.' I was walking in the woods
when what had always seemed a stable, solid world 'unfroze' and seemed to 'melt' and fall away
toward some cosmic event horizon when, simultaneously, it also shot upward, like an interpenetrating
fountain. In this upsurge I felt the sensation of being born; in the downward movement, I felt the
sensation of death and disintegration. Where the two streams met I felt a vortex that I realized
as the template of all sense of self--"Ah, I said, this is the Buddha. All other 'form' then is a type of
avatar of this spectral Buddha."
And while this experience seems to accord with the Buddha's interpenetrating, astivada, existential
stance, my feeling is that any sort of absolute duality, including that between noumena and phenomena,
essence and existence, or noun and verb, is illusory. The physicist David Bohm has said that
meaning = flow = being. Like Buddha, he felt this sort of enlightenment could not be reached
through any sort Aristotelian logic that assumed an ego-subject as the beginning and end point,
but was experiential in nature and transcended thought.
So, any responses. What do you think?