masturbation what's wrong?

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tiltbillings
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby tiltbillings » Mon Aug 10, 2009 4:57 am


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mikenz66
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby mikenz66 » Mon Aug 10, 2009 5:27 am

That quote from me had nothing to do with guilt, just time wasting. Like playing video games, or watching TV, or ... umm ... surfing the internet... :coffee:

Obsessive behaviour with any of the above can be, as Tilt points out, a serious problem.

Mike

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Dan74
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Dan74 » Mon Aug 10, 2009 5:29 am

The question "Is it wrong?" is in a sense a wrong question. Ultimately any type of desire is to be discarded as unskillful, but this teaching can be harmful to someone already plagued with guilt and self-loathing.

In general, tilt's approach above is the healthiest one, I think. I would also add that accepting who we are is the necessary first step for going forward. And acceptance is by nature non-judgmental. If you experience strong desire, bring awareness to it, notice the consequences, think what role it plays in your life, read what the suttas and wise people say about it, do purification practices if you are so inclined, but don't obsess over it. Eventually we discard desire because it is no longer relevant to us.

_/|\_
_/|\_

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mikenz66
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby mikenz66 » Mon Aug 10, 2009 5:41 am


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cooran
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby cooran » Mon Aug 10, 2009 5:43 am

Hello all,

What do you think?

Buddhist Sexual Ethics by Winston Higgins


- with a Rejoinder by Ajahn Brahmavamso and
Ajahn Nanadhammo



metta
Chris
---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---

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Pannapetar
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Pannapetar » Mon Aug 10, 2009 5:50 am


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tiltbillings
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby tiltbillings » Mon Aug 10, 2009 5:55 am

What Thomas said.

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tiltbillings
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby tiltbillings » Mon Aug 10, 2009 6:12 am

I am beginning to like Ajahn Brahmavamso less and less the more I read of him. His “rejoinder” failed to mention that much of texts he quoted are addressed to monastics, not laity. That is a significant distinction.

If we are talking to laity, then Winston Higgins’ article is more reasonable, and we do not need to make Ajahn Brahm’s fallacious distinction: To some, it offers wise and compassionate advice on how to lessen the suffering of modern lay life. To others, it is the path to Enlightenment which ends all suffering.

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cooran
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby cooran » Mon Aug 10, 2009 7:17 am

---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---

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tiltbillings
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby tiltbillings » Mon Aug 10, 2009 7:43 am


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Macavity
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Macavity » Mon Aug 10, 2009 8:14 am


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cooran
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby cooran » Mon Aug 10, 2009 10:26 am

Hello Tilt and Macavity,

Perhaps. But don't you think frequent or habitual masturbation (akusala sankharas) simply strengthens unwholesome latent tendencies?

Tilt - have you met Ajahn Brahms? I have a photo of he an I taken in 2006 packed away somewhere. What of all the wonderful work he has done in spreading the Dhamma, establishing monasteries for males and females, tirelessly working for good of the Sasana .... and you disparage him just because you and he disagree over mastrubation? I am surprised.

metta
Chris
---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---

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tiltbillings
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby tiltbillings » Mon Aug 10, 2009 10:46 am


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cooran
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby cooran » Mon Aug 10, 2009 10:49 am

Hello Tilt

No - no-one is above criticism. Just that I've been brought up 'to play the ball, not the man'.

metta
Chris
---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---

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tiltbillings
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby tiltbillings » Mon Aug 10, 2009 10:54 am


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Pannapetar
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Pannapetar » Mon Aug 10, 2009 11:11 am


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Ben
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Ben » Mon Aug 10, 2009 11:47 am

“No lists of things to be done. The day providential to itself. The hour. There is no later. This is later. All things of grace and beauty such that one holds them to one's heart have a common provenance in pain. Their birth in grief and ashes.”
- Cormac McCarthy, The Road

Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.
- Sutta Nipata 3.725

(Buddhist aid in Myanmar) • •

e: [email protected]..

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Macavity
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Macavity » Mon Aug 10, 2009 12:56 pm


Individual
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Individual » Mon Aug 10, 2009 3:25 pm

The best things in life aren't things.


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Macavity
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Re: masturbation what's wrong?

Postby Macavity » Mon Aug 10, 2009 4:28 pm



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