Feeling Unsafe

Casual discussion amongst spiritual friends.

Feeling Unsafe

Postby sattva » Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:16 am

I am probably 75% sure that this is only in my mind, but I am feeling a lot of fear about my move to a new place this weekend. Part of it may have to do with the fact that I have lived most of my life with other people and now I will be living alone. Add to that the facts that I am 60, with multiple health problems, including some mobility problems. I was once physically quite strong and now I couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. I am not very happy about the location of the move but have no where else to go right now. I guess what I am feeling is very vulnerable and scared. Besides doing metta, which Buddha recommended for fear, does anyone else know of any other practices, chants, visualizations, etc., that could help me during this transition? My gut is saying run for the hills.
User avatar
sattva
 
Posts: 616
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:07 pm
Location: the western part of Maryland

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby cooran » Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:26 am

Hello sattva,

Metta is good, but so are some other ways:

https://www.psychology.org.au/publicati ... nxiety/#s6

With metta,
Chris
---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---
User avatar
cooran
 
Posts: 7639
Joined: Tue Jan 06, 2009 11:32 pm
Location: Queensland, Australia

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby Kusala » Fri Mar 14, 2014 4:47 am

sattva wrote:I am probably 75% sure that this is only in my mind, but I am feeling a lot of fear about my move to a new place this weekend. Part of it may have to do with the fact that I have lived most of my life with other people and now I will be living alone. Add to that the facts that I am 60, with multiple health problems, including some mobility problems. I was once physically quite strong and now I couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. I am not very happy about the location of the move but have no where else to go right now. I guess what I am feeling is very vulnerable and scared. Besides doing metta, which Buddha recommended for fear, does anyone else know of any other practices, chants, visualizations, etc., that could help me during this transition? My gut is saying run for the hills.


These Dhamma talks may help... http://www.audiodharma.org/talks/?search=fear
Image

Homage to the Buddha
Thus indeed, is that Blessed One: He is the Holy One, fully enlightened, endowed with clear vision and virtuous conduct, sublime, the Knower of the worlds, the incomparable leader of men to be tamed, the teacher of gods and men, enlightened and blessed.

Homage to the Teachings
The Dhamma of the Blessed One is perfectly expounded; to be seen here and now; not delayed in
time; inviting one to come and see; onward leading (to Nibbana); to be known by the wise, each for himself.
User avatar
Kusala
 
Posts: 453
Joined: Sun Jan 23, 2011 11:02 am

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby sattva » Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:26 am

cooran wrote:Hello sattva,

Metta is good, but so are some other ways:

https://www.psychology.org.au/publicati ... nxiety/#s6

With metta,
Chris


Thanks, Chris!
User avatar
sattva
 
Posts: 616
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:07 pm
Location: the western part of Maryland

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby sattva » Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:28 am

Kusala wrote:
sattva wrote:I am probably 75% sure that this is only in my mind, but I am feeling a lot of fear about my move to a new place this weekend. Part of it may have to do with the fact that I have lived most of my life with other people and now I will be living alone. Add to that the facts that I am 60, with multiple health problems, including some mobility problems. I was once physically quite strong and now I couldn't fight my way out of a paper bag. I am not very happy about the location of the move but have no where else to go right now. I guess what I am feeling is very vulnerable and scared. Besides doing metta, which Buddha recommended for fear, does anyone else know of any other practices, chants, visualizations, etc., that could help me during this transition? My gut is saying run for the hills.


These Dhamma talks may help... http://www.audiodharma.org/talks/?search=fear


Thanks, Kusala, ---what an impressive amount of talks on the subject!
User avatar
sattva
 
Posts: 616
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:07 pm
Location: the western part of Maryland

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby plwk » Fri Mar 14, 2014 5:39 am

Try this and this
Bhikkhus, if you develop and make much this one thing,
it invariably leads to weariness, cessation, appeasement, realization and extinction.
What is it? It is recollecting the Enlightened One.
If this single thing is recollected and made much,
it invariably leads to weariness, cessation, appeasement, realization and extinction.

Anguttara-Nikaya: Ekanipata: Ekadhammapali: Pañhamavagga
VSM VMM WBB TBHT WTBT My Page
plwk
 
Posts: 1159
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:14 am

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby sattva » Fri Mar 14, 2014 6:53 am

plwk wrote:Try this and this


Thanks plwk! If I could take Sammy with me, I would probably feel better :D
Attachments
pics 017 (2) (110x83).jpg
pics 017 (2) (110x83).jpg (75.28 KiB) Viewed 334 times
pics 015 (2) (110x110).jpg
pics 015 (2) (110x110).jpg (72.82 KiB) Viewed 334 times
User avatar
sattva
 
Posts: 616
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:07 pm
Location: the western part of Maryland

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby cooran » Fri Mar 14, 2014 7:33 am

What is going to happen to Sammy? Is he going to be rehoused?

With metta,
Chris
---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---
User avatar
cooran
 
Posts: 7639
Joined: Tue Jan 06, 2009 11:32 pm
Location: Queensland, Australia

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby plwk » Fri Mar 14, 2014 10:19 am

:shock: What a gorgeous Sammy :thumbsup:
Yeah, what's going to happen to Sammy?
Bhikkhus, if you develop and make much this one thing,
it invariably leads to weariness, cessation, appeasement, realization and extinction.
What is it? It is recollecting the Enlightened One.
If this single thing is recollected and made much,
it invariably leads to weariness, cessation, appeasement, realization and extinction.

Anguttara-Nikaya: Ekanipata: Ekadhammapali: Pañhamavagga
VSM VMM WBB TBHT WTBT My Page
plwk
 
Posts: 1159
Joined: Mon Mar 01, 2010 5:14 am

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby Anagarika » Fri Mar 14, 2014 12:05 pm

Sattva:

Already there are excellent suggestions to you. One thought I had was to practice a meditation on gratitude. A neuroscientist with a Buddhist approach has suggested that we can reset our anxiety and depression "setpoints" by concentrating on what in our life we can be grateful for. Even in difficult circumstances, we can meditate on the fact that we live in a country not at war, we have clean water and food to consume, we have someone in our lives that cares for us, we have a roof over our heads. We meditate on the idea that for millions of people, the above is not true; others exist that suffer from hunger, misery, and homelessness. See if there are threads of hope that you can tease out of your situation.

I also recall that HHDL and Dr. Howard Cutler wrote a book wherein Dr. Cutler advises that we all have contacts with community. He stated that one outside group involvement or hobby can elevate mood, and extend our lives. Two activities or groups can double this life extension. The idea is that along with his treatment of patients for anxiety and depression with therapy and medication, he had them as part of their treatment connect with people, join groups, develop hobbies. He claims that this interaction made a huge difference. Perhaps, as you venture forth to living alone, you can develop skills that will connect you with others, even with mobility issues.
User avatar
Anagarika
 
Posts: 612
Joined: Thu Sep 22, 2011 11:25 pm

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby Aloka » Fri Mar 14, 2014 1:53 pm

Hi sattva,

This short article from Ajahn Amaro "Inviting Fear" might be helpful.

http://www.tricycle.com/practice/inviting-fear

I hope things go well for you.

With metta,

Aloka :hug:
User avatar
Aloka
 
Posts: 3671
Joined: Wed Jan 21, 2009 2:51 pm

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby Kasina » Fri Mar 14, 2014 8:40 pm

cooran wrote:Hello sattva,

Metta is good, but so are some other ways:

https://www.psychology.org.au/publicati ... nxiety/#s6

With metta,
Chris


Kusala wrote:These Dhamma talks may help... http://www.audiodharma.org/talks/?search=fear


Both these posts helped me, good site Kusala.

:anjali:
"This world completely lacks essence;
It trembles in all directions.
I longed to find myself a place
Unscathed — but I could not see it."


Sn 4.15 PTS: Sn 935-951 "Attadanda Sutta: Arming Oneself"

"You will be required to do wrong no matter where you go... This is the curse at work, the curse that feeds on all life..."

Wilbur Mercer in Do Androids Dream of Electric Sheep?
User avatar
Kasina
 
Posts: 228
Joined: Wed Jan 22, 2014 6:35 pm
Location: Barrie, Canada

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby sattva » Sat Mar 15, 2014 4:46 am

cooran wrote:What is going to happen to Sammy? Is he going to be rehoused?

With metta,
Chris


Sammy is going to be fine! Thanks for asking Chis and plwk. I am the one leaving. He will be staying right here with his mother (my niece), her new husband, and my fairly newly retired sister. Sammy along with Cane gets lots of love and attention which is right up his alley. He is such a friendly, affectionate, and mischievous cat! It would be hard not to love him. My bedroom will hopefully become a nursery before the year has ended, which is why I am leaving. Cane is more standoffish, but we get along okay. There are some people he doesn't take too at all, but he is a pretty cat. They are both really big cats!













`
Attachments
pics 013 (200x150).jpg
pics 013 (200x150).jpg (98.6 KiB) Viewed 214 times
User avatar
sattva
 
Posts: 616
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:07 pm
Location: the western part of Maryland

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby sattva » Sat Mar 15, 2014 4:57 am

BuddhaSoup wrote:Sattva:

Already there are excellent suggestions to you. One thought I had was to practice a meditation on gratitude. (sattva: An excellent idea and one every so often my teacher reminds me of!) A neuroscientist with a Buddhist approach has suggested that we can reset our anxiety and depression "setpoints" by concentrating on what in our life we can be grateful for. Even in difficult circumstances, we can meditate on the fact that we live in a country not at war, we have clean water and food to consume, we have someone in our lives that cares for us, we have a roof over our heads. We meditate on the idea that for millions of people, the above is not true; others exist that suffer from hunger, misery, and homelessness. See if there are threads of hope that you can tease out of your situation.

I also recall that HHDL and Dr. Howard Cutler wrote a book wherein Dr. Cutler advises that we all have contacts with community. He stated that one outside group involvement or hobby can elevate mood, and extend our lives. Two activities or groups can double this life extension. The idea is that along with his treatment of patients for anxiety and depression with therapy and medication, he had them as part of their treatment connect with people, join groups, develop hobbies. He claims that this interaction made a huge difference. (sattva: I really like this idea. Thanks!) Perhaps, as you venture forth to living alone, you can develop skills that will connect you with others, even with mobility issues.


:goodpost:
User avatar
sattva
 
Posts: 616
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:07 pm
Location: the western part of Maryland

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby sattva » Sat Mar 15, 2014 4:59 am

Aloka wrote:Hi sattva,

This short article from Ajahn Amaro "Inviting Fear" might be helpful.

http://www.tricycle.com/practice/inviting-fear

I hope things go well for you.

With metta,

Aloka :hug:

Thanks! :hug:
User avatar
sattva
 
Posts: 616
Joined: Thu May 07, 2009 10:07 pm
Location: the western part of Maryland

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby Modus.Ponens » Sat Mar 15, 2014 11:40 am

Hello Sattva

I hope this fear is temporary and fades quickly. Wishing you the best.

Metta.
And the Blessed One addressed the bhikkhus, saying: "Behold now, bhikkhus, I exhort you: All compounded things are subject to vanish. Strive with earnestness!"
User avatar
Modus.Ponens
 
Posts: 2013
Joined: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:38 am
Location: Funchal, Portugal

Re: Feeling Unsafe

Postby Cittasanto » Mon Mar 17, 2014 5:59 pm

hi Sattva,
I can't add anything that hasn't already been advised, but, I hope your move is better than expected, and Sammy is looked after like a kitty cat should be :)

Best Wishes
This offering maybe right, or wrong, but it is one, the other, both, or neither!
Blog, - Some Suttas Translated, Ajahn Chah.
"Others will misconstrue reality due to their personal perspectives, doggedly holding onto and not easily discarding them; We shall not misconstrue reality due to our own personal perspectives, nor doggedly holding onto them, but will discard them easily. This effacement shall be done."
User avatar
Cittasanto
 
Posts: 5754
Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 10:31 pm
Location: Ellan Vannin


Return to Lounge

Who is online

Users browsing this forum: Bhikkhu Pesala, Jeffrey and 10 guests