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Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'? - Dhamma Wheel

Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Exploring Theravāda's connections to other paths. What can we learn from other traditions, religions and philosophies?
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Annapurna
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Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Annapurna » Wed Dec 30, 2009 11:59 am

It just crossed my mind.

In case we agree, that men in general, -with the exception of those Buddhist males who read this, of course,- tend to be more aggressive, tend to become physically violent more often , abusive, are more forceful, and women tend to be softer, more actively compassionate than men, then isn't a lot of spiritual cultivation about developing a bit more of the 'female' side in ourselves, the softer and more sensitive side?

Are the men who practice Buddhism and so cultivate themselves, basically rediscovering their female aspects and begin to live them out, whilst others deny them, belittle them or are ashamed of sensitivity, caring, being gentle, being kind and compassionate?

Apropos, "gentle".

What is a perfect gentleman?

A Buddhist?

:anjali:

PS; I am aware of the sutta where 'form' is the issue and that you're stuck when you begin to classify...
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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Paññāsikhara » Wed Dec 30, 2009 12:27 pm

If we are going to go with such stereotypes (which I don't necessary agree with, but know are popular), then one could also do the terribly over-generalized line of how women need to bring out some particular qualities which are often associated with the male of the species.

In short, I think it misses the point. Both males and females have good qualities and need to bring these out, and both also have negative qualities, which need to be overcome.

Conze does have an interesting comment on what you say though, but I'm not going to quote it for you right now! Somewhere in his article "Hate, Love and Perfect Wisdom", pg. 188 in Thirty Years of Buddhist Studies, 1967.
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Dan74
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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Dan74 » Wed Dec 30, 2009 12:47 pm

This sounds like the classical Jungian project which has found its way into popular culture. The man reconnect with their Anima and women with the Animus. Jung's formulation (being the first) was pretty simplistic.

In any case I guess in meditation things come up and in facing them we become more balanced and well-rounded as individuals.

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby chownah » Wed Dec 30, 2009 2:18 pm

Men in general wear pants more and women tend to wear skirts more so does this mean that women who wear pants are getting in touch with their masculine sides and the men in Burma who wear skirts are getting in touch with their feminine sides?

Men in general have more facial hair while women generally have a higher percentage of body fat....does this mean that women with facial hair are more in touch with their masculine side and fat men are more in touch with their femine side?

Men in general have A and women in general have B so does this mean that if women have A etc. and if men have B etc.?

chownah

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Cittasanto » Wed Dec 30, 2009 2:22 pm

Dhamma Training isn't about balancing the sexes, both have the same desirable and undesirable qualities which need to be uprooted.


He who knows only his own side of the case knows little of that. His reasons may be good, and no one may have been able to refute them.
But if he is equally unable to refute the reasons on the opposite side, if he does not so much as know what they are, he has no ground for preferring either opinion …
...
He must be able to hear them from persons who actually believe them … he must know them in their most plausible and persuasive form.

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Annapurna » Wed Dec 30, 2009 3:32 pm

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Annapurna » Wed Dec 30, 2009 3:34 pm

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby David N. Snyder » Wed Dec 30, 2009 4:11 pm

These are all stereotypes of course and there are plenty of exceptions (that prove the rule :tongue: ) , but still an interesting topic.

Women are often associated with compassion, nurturing, mothering, and loving-kindness; two of the brahma viharas: metta and karuna.

Men are often associated with being more stoic, not showing their emotions, not crying, etc; two of the brahma viharas: upekkha and mudita.

So maybe, men are becoming more feminine, but women are also becoming more masculine, with the practice. Or maybe we are all becoming neuter. :tongue:
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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Monkey Mind » Wed Dec 30, 2009 4:20 pm

Ajahn Vayama reminded us in a podcast that we have all been men and we have all been women in countless previous lives. It is not so much that we are "male" or "female" in this life, but we have the capacity, and the history/ kammic energy for both.
"As I am, so are others;
as others are, so am I."
Having thus identified self and others,
harm no one nor have them harmed.

Sutta Nipāta 3.710

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby AdvaitaJ » Thu Dec 31, 2009 12:38 am

Annabel,

Not more feminine, but definitely more peaceful Speaking for myself, I am much less inclined to anger, much less prone to planning for conflict, and quite possibly, much less ready to deal with conflict should it arise. My wife has noticed the change in me over these past months and, on rare occasion, she says "Don't forget how to be a Marine." (I was in the Marine Corps in my youth and it made a powerful and lasting impression on me.)

Regards: AdvaitaJ
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We sit together, the mountain and me, until only the mountain remains.
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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Paññāsikhara » Thu Dec 31, 2009 3:10 am

My recently moved Blog, containing some of my writings on the Buddha Dhamma, as well as a number of translations from classical Buddhist texts and modern authors, liturgy, etc.: .

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby catmoon » Thu Dec 31, 2009 3:14 am


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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Kim OHara » Thu Dec 31, 2009 3:54 am


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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby cooran » Thu Dec 31, 2009 4:44 am

Good post Kim. :smile:

Why concentrate on masculine or feminine?

What difference does being a woman make
When the mind is well-composed,
When knowledge is proceeding on,
When one rightly sees into Dhamma?
Indeed for whom the question arises:
"Am I a man or a woman?"
Or, "Am I even something at all?"
To them alone is Mara fit to talk!
http://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitaka ... .olen.html

metta
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---The trouble is that you think you have time---
---Worry is the Interest, paid in advance, on a debt you may never owe---
---It's not what happens to you in life that is important ~ it's what you do with it ---

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Dan74 » Thu Dec 31, 2009 4:57 am

_/|\_

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Paññāsikhara » Thu Dec 31, 2009 5:02 am

My recently moved Blog, containing some of my writings on the Buddha Dhamma, as well as a number of translations from classical Buddhist texts and modern authors, liturgy, etc.: .

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Annapurna » Thu Dec 31, 2009 9:13 am

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

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Annapurna
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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Annapurna » Thu Dec 31, 2009 9:17 am

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/

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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby retrofuturist » Thu Dec 31, 2009 9:25 am

"Do not force others, including children, by any means whatsoever, to adopt your views, whether by authority, threat, money, propaganda, or even education." - Ven. Thich Nhat Hanh

"The uprooting of identity is seen by the noble ones as pleasurable; but this contradicts what the whole world sees." (Snp 3.12)

"To argue with a person who has renounced the use of reason is like administering medicine to the dead" - Thomas Paine

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Annapurna
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Re: Does Buddhism mean we "become" more 'feminine'?

Postby Annapurna » Thu Dec 31, 2009 9:33 am

http://www.schmuckzauberei.blogspot.com/


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