MayaRefugee wrote:It would be nice to have a different body shape:
- to rub it in the nose of those people in my memory/dreams that teased/tease my younger self about my/its aesthetic.
- to see what doors open up as a result.
- so I'm doing what healthy people do and caring about my health.
My reasons are stupid and superficial and I don't really believe in them.....
Your reasons are understandable though. Getting teased is usually a bitter lesson.
I'm sure the hardships of weight loss (hunger, desire, craving, loss of pleasure/ comfort) are easier to bear when you imagine all the benefits you will enjoy:
Better health, self-confidence, and perhaps better relationships.
Please don't think that you are superficial or that you goals are.
You're trying to adapt to a superficial world.
In a way, those people are your 'friends', as hard as it may be to see.
They push you in the right direction, only with unpleasant means, even hostility.
It could be that if you have acquired a perfect physical shape, they will find something else they must correct in you.
Why? Because people 'hate' something in themselves.
Hermann Hesse: If you hate a person, you hate something in him that is part of yourself. What isn't part of ourselves doesn't disturb us.
Of course hate is a bit too strong here.
I wish you success, and that you reach your ideal shape, and that you will be healthy!