Party - Alcohol

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grasshopper
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Party - Alcohol

Postby grasshopper » Mon Nov 15, 2010 9:28 am

Hey people,

I have been invited to a dinner (only 4 people in total) and the "norm" around here is people take a bottle of champagne/ wine/ 6-pack of beer etc. as a guest, without going empty-handed. But I do not drink, period. What else is there to take to a party of young people other than booze? It would be rude to take a bottle to the party but decline a drink from the very bottle that you just gave them, wouldn't it? All suggestions are much appreciated, thank you :)

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retrofuturist
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby retrofuturist » Mon Nov 15, 2010 9:31 am

Greetings

Ask them in advance if they need you to bring anything (e.g. dessert, salads)... then that can be the thing you bring.

Metta,
Retro. :)
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Whatever various forms of unease there are in the world, They originate founded in encumbering accumulation. (Pārāyanavagga)


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One who is such, calmed and ever mindful, He has no sorrows! -- Udana IV, 7


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Dan74
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Dan74 » Mon Nov 15, 2010 9:56 am

According to the anecdote I heard, a famous monk (Mahayana though) when visiting the US in the late 70ies, when invited and given wine, would happily toast with his hosts but not actually drink. Throughout the whole trip noone seemed to have noticed.

So if you brought the wine and you were poured some, you don't have to drink it. If they notice you can say why. If they don't, well...

It depends on the environment of course.
Last edited by Dan74 on Mon Nov 15, 2010 10:47 am, edited 1 time in total.
_/|\_

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Bhikkhu Pesala
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Bhikkhu Pesala » Mon Nov 15, 2010 10:00 am

Take some chocolates.
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Paññāsikhara
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Paññāsikhara » Mon Nov 15, 2010 10:20 am

Sparkling grape juice, fruit juice, ... there are plenty of things.
The chocolates idea is a good one, too. (Just not the liquer center ones!)
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Ben
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Ben » Mon Nov 15, 2010 11:09 am

I take a bottle or two of softdrink and something else, like a desert, salad, bread, chocolate.
And I've never had any grief over it.
And its no big deal being a non-drinker these days. We're everywhere!
Learn this from the waters:
in mountain clefts and chasms,
loud gush the streamlets,
but great rivers flow silently.

Taṃ nadīhi vijānātha:
sobbhesu padaresu ca,
saṇantā yanti kusobbhā,
tuṇhīyanti mahodadhī.

Sutta Nipata 3.725

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grasshopper
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby grasshopper » Tue Nov 16, 2010 9:24 am

Thank you very much all! Chocolates and dessert! Gosh, how could I forget, lol. The plan is to take garlic bread, ice cream and also a pot plant for the lovely hostess :D

Mawkish1983
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Mawkish1983 » Tue Nov 16, 2010 7:48 pm

Ben wrote:And its no big deal being a non-drinker these days. We're everywhere!
True :)

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Monkey Mind
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Monkey Mind » Wed Nov 17, 2010 6:19 am

grasshopper wrote:Thank you very much all! Chocolates and dessert! Gosh, how could I forget, lol. The plan is to take garlic bread, ice cream and also a pot plant for the lovely hostess :D

Smooth! Nicely done! I asked a bhikkhu about this very situation. Answer: if you told people that your doctor has advised you to stop drinking, no one would question this. Buddha often compared himself to be a physician, so...
"As I am, so are others;
as others are, so am I."
Having thus identified self and others,
harm no one nor have them harmed.

Sutta Nipāta 3.710

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Hanzze
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Hanzze » Wed Nov 17, 2010 6:32 am

_/\_
Last edited by Hanzze on Thu Jan 13, 2011 4:41 pm, edited 1 time in total.
Just that! *smile*
...We Buddhists must find the courage to leave our temples and enter the temples of human experience, temples that are filled with suffering. If we listen to Buddha, Christ, or Gandhi, we can do nothing else. The refugee camps, the prisons, the ghettos, and the battlefields will become our temples. We have so much work to do. ... Peace is Possible! Step by Step. - Samtach Preah Maha Ghosananda "Step by Step" http://www.ghosananda.org/bio_book.html

BUT! it is important to become a real Buddhist first. Like Punna did: Punna Sutta Nate sante baram sokham _()_

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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Sanghamitta » Wed Nov 17, 2010 10:11 am

Hanzze wrote:
grasshopper wrote:Thank you very much all! Chocolates and dessert! Gosh, how could I forget, lol. The plan is to take garlic bread, ice cream and also a pot plant for the lovely hostess :D

Mahayana Buddhist would tell you that garlic is not that good. It develops hormones which are not beneficial for a peaceful mind. Chocolate hormones are good but some could identify it as happiness drugs :-)
Give your self your happiness and joy is a good present. :-)

Someone said one up a comic movie: Be just in the present... That is why it is called present! :-)


Lets not confuse the issue by adding proscriptions that are not considered relevant in the Theravada....garlic has all sorts of health giving properties.
If the hostess was a Mahayana Buddhist it might be relevant.....
The going for refuge is the door of entrance to the teachings of the Buddha.

Bhikku Bodhi.

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Hanzze
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Re: Party - Alcohol

Postby Hanzze » Wed Nov 17, 2010 2:44 pm

_/\_
Just that! *smile*
...We Buddhists must find the courage to leave our temples and enter the temples of human experience, temples that are filled with suffering. If we listen to Buddha, Christ, or Gandhi, we can do nothing else. The refugee camps, the prisons, the ghettos, and the battlefields will become our temples. We have so much work to do. ... Peace is Possible! Step by Step. - Samtach Preah Maha Ghosananda "Step by Step" http://www.ghosananda.org/bio_book.html

BUT! it is important to become a real Buddhist first. Like Punna did: Punna Sutta Nate sante baram sokham _()_


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