Ideal Wife

Balancing family life and the Dhamma, in pursuit of a happy lay life.
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Eko Care
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Ideal Wife

Post by Eko Care »

“Sir, this is not my only incredible and amazing quality; there is another. I had an only son called Nanda who I loved dearly. The rulers forcibly abducted him on some pretext and had him executed. But I can’t recall getting upset when my boy was under arrest or being arrested, imprisoned or being put in prison, killed or being killed.”

“It’s incredible, Nanda’s Mother, it’s amazing that you purify even the arising of a thought.”

“Sir, this is not my only incredible and amazing quality; there is another. When my husband passed away he was reborn in one of the realms of spirits. He revealed to me his previous life-form. But I can’t recall getting upset on that account.”

“It’s incredible, Nanda’s Mother, it’s amazing that you purify even the arising of a thought.”

“Sir, this is not my only incredible and amazing quality; there is another. Ever since we were both young, and I was given in marriage to my husband, I can’t recall betraying him even in thought, still less in deed.”

“It’s incredible, Nanda’s Mother, it’s amazing that you purify even the arising of a thought.”

“Sir, this is not my only incredible and amazing quality; there is another. Ever since I declared myself a lay follower, I can’t recall deliberately breaking any precept.”
Nanda’s Mother (AN7.53)
Now at that time the householder Nakula’s father was sick, suffering, gravely ill. Then the housewife Nakula’s mother said to him:

“Householder, don’t pass away with concerns. Such concern is suffering, and it’s criticized by the Buddha. Householder, you might think: ‘When I’ve gone, the housewife Nakula’s mother won’t be able to provide for the children and keep up the household carpets.’ But you should not see it like this. I’m skilled at spinning cotton and carding wool. I’m able to provide for the children and keep up the household carpets. So householder, don’t pass away with concerns …

Householder, you might think: ‘When I’ve gone, the housewife Nakula’s mother will take another husband.’ But you should not see it like this. Both you and I know that we have remained celibate while at home for the past sixteen years. So householder, don’t pass away with concerns …

Householder, you might think: ‘When I’ve gone, the housewife Nakula’s mother won’t want to see the Buddha and his Saṅgha of mendicants.’ But you should not see it like this. When you’ve gone, I’ll want to see the Buddha and his mendicant Saṅgha even more. So householder, don’t pass away with concerns …
Nakula’s Father (AN6.16)
They were the role models of ancient Buddhist women.
Will they be the role models of future Buddhist women?
Do you think you know better than the ancient Sangha ?
classicaltheravada.wordpress.com
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DooDoot
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by DooDoot »

Eko Care wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:16 pm They were the role models of ancient Buddhist women.
Will they be the role models of future Buddhist women?
They probably attained the noble path after they finished with their instinctual lustful reproductive duties; which probably occurred prior to them learning about the Buddha-Dhamma.

Women with such underlying enlightenment potential today would probably not get married & therefore not become a "wife". This topic appears illogical.
There is always an official executioner. If you try to take his place, It is like trying to be a master carpenter and cutting wood. If you try to cut wood like a master carpenter, you will only hurt your hand.

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TRobinson465
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by TRobinson465 »

They probably attained the noble path after they finished with their instinctual lustful reproductive duties; which probably occurred prior to them learning about the Buddha-Dhamma.

Women with such underlying enlightenment potential today would probably not get married & therefore not become a "wife". This topic appears illogical.
Doubt that. Visakha was a sotapanna at age 7. and got married and reproduced many times throughout her life far beyond the age of 7.
"Do not have blind faith, but also no blind criticism" - the 14th Dalai Lama

"At Varanasi, in the Deer Park at Isipatana, the Blessed One has set in motion the unexcelled Wheel of Dhamma that cannot be stopped by brahmins, devas, Maras, Brahmas or anyone in the cosmos." -Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta

"Go forth, monks, for the good of the many, for the happiness of the many, out of compassion for the world, for the welfare, the good and the happiness of gods and men. Let no two of you go in the same direction." - First Khandhaka, Chapter 11, Vinaya.
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DooDoot
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by DooDoot »

TRobinson465 wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:54 pm Doubt that. Visakha was a sotapanna at age 7. and got married and reproduced many times throughout her life far beyond the age of 7.
According to what? Fables in commentaries? What evidence can you provide to support your absence of doubt? Does this absence of doubt qualify for stream-entry? Why would a 7 year old stream-enterer not become an arahant by 18 years old?
Eko Care wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:16 pm Will they be the role models of future Buddhist women?
Possibly we can have a category called "child stream-enterer" on internet dating sites or with Thai mail order brides.
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There is always an official executioner. If you try to take his place, It is like trying to be a master carpenter and cutting wood. If you try to cut wood like a master carpenter, you will only hurt your hand.

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TRobinson465
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by TRobinson465 »

DooDoot wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 12:07 am
TRobinson465 wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:54 pm Doubt that. Visakha was a sotapanna at age 7. and got married and reproduced many times throughout her life far beyond the age of 7.
According to what? Fables in commentaries? What evidence can you provide to support your absence of doubt? Does this absence of doubt qualify for stream-entry? Why would a 7 year old stream-enterer not become an arahant by 18 years old?
Im not gonna sit there and argue with you if you just pick and choose which evidence is "real" anyways. Especially when u yourself are making baseless claims like 7 yo stream enterers should become arahants by 18 (as if it was somehow logical that the legal adulthood age that was artificially selected in some western countries over the past century is some kind of baseline)
"Do not have blind faith, but also no blind criticism" - the 14th Dalai Lama

"At Varanasi, in the Deer Park at Isipatana, the Blessed One has set in motion the unexcelled Wheel of Dhamma that cannot be stopped by brahmins, devas, Maras, Brahmas or anyone in the cosmos." -Dhammacakkappavattana Sutta

"Go forth, monks, for the good of the many, for the happiness of the many, out of compassion for the world, for the welfare, the good and the happiness of gods and men. Let no two of you go in the same direction." - First Khandhaka, Chapter 11, Vinaya.
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Aloka
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by Aloka »

Ekocare wrote:They were the role models of ancient Buddhist women.
Will they be the role models of future Buddhist women?
Why speculate and gossip about women on a public forum with other men, instead of focusing on the improvement of your own practice and understanding ?

:shrug:
Last edited by Aloka on Sun Apr 18, 2021 5:43 am, edited 1 time in total.
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Aloka
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by Aloka »

DooDoot wrote: Women with such underlying enlightenment potential today would probably not get married & therefore not become a "wife". This topic appears illogical.
Many women in the modern world generally, hope to have a fulfilling career rather than being an "ideal wife"!



Here's one of my favourite verses:

I.11 — Mutta {v. 11}

So freed! So thoroughly freed am I! —
from three crooked things set free:
from mortar, pestle,
& crooked old husband.
Having uprooted the craving
that leads to becoming,
I'm set free from aging & death.

https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitak ... l#sutta-11
.
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DooDoot
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by DooDoot »

Aloka wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 5:33 am

I.11 — Mutta {v. 11}

So freed! So thoroughly freed am I! —
from three crooked things set free:
from mortar, pestle,
& crooked old husband.
:anjali: :bow: :bow: :bow:
There is always an official executioner. If you try to take his place, It is like trying to be a master carpenter and cutting wood. If you try to cut wood like a master carpenter, you will only hurt your hand.

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sphairos
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by sphairos »

But what if the crooked old husband is a billionaire?
Aloka wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 5:33 am
DooDoot wrote: Women with such underlying enlightenment potential today would probably not get married & therefore not become a "wife". This topic appears illogical.
Many women in the modern world generally, hope to have a fulfilling career rather than being an "ideal wife"!



Here's one of my favourite verses:

I.11 — Mutta {v. 11}

So freed! So thoroughly freed am I! —
from three crooked things set free:
from mortar, pestle,
& crooked old husband.
Having uprooted the craving
that leads to becoming,
I'm set free from aging & death.

https://www.accesstoinsight.org/tipitak ... l#sutta-11
.
How good and wonderful are your days,
How true are your ways?
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Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta »

TRobinson465 wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:54 pm
They probably attained the noble path after they finished with their instinctual lustful reproductive duties; which probably occurred prior to them learning about the Buddha-Dhamma.

Women with such underlying enlightenment potential today would probably not get married & therefore not become a "wife". This topic appears illogical.
Doubt that. Visakha was a sotapanna at age 7. and got married and reproduced many times throughout her life far beyond the age of 7.
:goodpost:
.


🅢🅐🅑🅑🅔 🅓🅗🅐🅜🅜🅐 🅐🅝🅐🅣🅣🅐

Self ...
  • "an entirely and perfectly foolish idea" :D ~ MN22
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DooDoot
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by DooDoot »

Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 11:15 am :goodpost:
Good imaginary story telling.
There is always an official executioner. If you try to take his place, It is like trying to be a master carpenter and cutting wood. If you try to cut wood like a master carpenter, you will only hurt your hand.

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robertk
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by robertk »

Sabbe_Dhamma_Anatta wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 11:15 am
TRobinson465 wrote: Sat Apr 17, 2021 11:54 pm
They probably attained the noble path after they finished with their instinctual lustful reproductive duties; which probably occurred prior to them learning about the Buddha-Dhamma.

Women with such underlying enlightenment potential today would probably not get married & therefore not become a "wife". This topic appears illogical.
Doubt that. Visakha was a sotapanna at age 7. and got married and reproduced many times throughout her life far beyond the age of 7.
:goodpost:
a prior topic about Visakha.
there is an pdf link from a book edited by Bhikkhu Bodhi.

viewtopic.php?f=13&t=38641&p=592848&hil ... ha#p592848
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robertk
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by robertk »

There is also the sutta about the 7 kinds of wives:

https://suttacentral.net/an7.63/en/sujato
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retrofuturist
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by retrofuturist »

Greetings,

It's the six year wedding anniversary for me and my ideal wife today.

🥳

Metta,
Paul. :)
"The uprooting of identity is seen by the noble ones as pleasurable; but this contradicts what the whole world sees." (Snp 3.12)

"Why now do you assume 'a being'? Mara, have you grasped a view?" (SN 5.10)

"Overcome the liar by truth." (Dhp 223)
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robertk
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Re: Ideal Wife

Post by robertk »

retrofuturist wrote: Sun Apr 18, 2021 11:40 am Greetings,

It's the six year wedding anniversary for me and my ideal wife today.

🥳

Metta,
Paul. :)
:thumbsup: :thumbsup: :thumbsup:
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