HonestSeeker wrote: ↑Tue May 03, 2022 4:01 am
I am hoping to have an honest answer to my question, I am usually doing a lot of metta practice and I help a lot of people and do a lot of good karma in daily life, But I do have problems though, I watch porn once a week. no matter how much I try to avoid this, I end up watching porn and playing stupid porn games on the internet, I don’t have any intention of harming anyone, and I keep trying to quit this bad habit by reading about how porn actors and actresses are being exploited so that I can develop compassion and stop doing this, but I end up watching porn regardless and it’s getting to a point where I’m just sick and tired and I’m probably making bad karma from this addiction. I sometimes feel like a cow being led to slaughter at the whims of the butcher of sensual desire. Please give me advice, I have tried noting that this is not myself and it is likely caused by previous actions in the past , yet it doesn’t help break the habit. Even 32 parts of the body meditation seems not helpful. Was hoping to get some advice from an experienced practitioner of dhamma
You might try a few things.
Be mindful of how often you think about porn. Is it something happening throughout the day or just at the end of a long week the mind goes there after kicking off the shoes? If its often, be aware how often. If its not often, be aware how not often.
Notice it immediately and try to observe something that made it come up. You can build a deeper understanding of what leads to the behavior by watching where it comes from when it comes up and then dealing with those originators.
Replace the thought the moment it arises with another thought. Such as about what you're immediately occupied with rather than the mind's wanderings. Like a small peg dislodges a large peg.
Pull the experience apart when it happens. When I give in to urges it's usually because I enjoy them as an accumulation of sense experience. As many senses combined as possible for a well-rounded experience; eyes, ears, nose, tongue, body, mind all combined. Pulling each sense apart and take an examination of it like "This part is what the eye is doing, this part is what the body is doing, this part is what the mind is doing" really helps take the infatuation out of the combined sense experience.
You already have a good advantage being ardent, diligent, and resolute. keep experimenting til you find what works.
Probably works to some degree for music and tv entertainments too.
Just as a bird, wherever it goes, flies with its wings as its only burden; so too is he content with a set of robes to provide for his body and almsfood to provide for his hunger. Wherever he goes, he takes only his barest necessities along. This is how a monk is content.(DN11)