Dilemma

Balancing family life and the Dhamma, in pursuit of a happy lay life.
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mario92
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Dilemma

Post by mario92 »

Hello all, do You think is good idea to leave My family (parents) without their permission or without telling them? Would they became sad? Is it Bad? I'm in hard problem.
Neo
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Re: Dilemma

Post by Neo »

:popcorn:
:tongue: ask parents. :computerproblem:
McQueen
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Re: Dilemma

Post by McQueen »

Depends on the situation. If I were you, I'd do the thing that causes you the least amount of suffering. Sometimes leaving is best when the relationship is toxic. Will your regret from not saying goodbye be harmful to you? Will it be more harmful to say goodbye for you? Is there a middle way? Only you know what's best for you.
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Lucas Oliveira
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Re: Dilemma

Post by Lucas Oliveira »

I go to therapy with a psychologist and it helped me solve several problems with my family. Maybe you could try therapy too.

I heard a talk from a monk talking about our connection with family. that we are linked by strong karmic ties and that we must strive to have a good relationship with our family.

Of course, there will be cases where it is best to walk away, but even in these situations it is good to make it clear why we are moving away.

I think that if you move away from your family without telling them, it can cause a lot of suffering for you and your family.

Because of other topics you've already covered here, I recommend you seek help, whether from psychologists or psychiatrists, or simply friends, just talking to other people about your concerns can help a lot.

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Rambutan
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Re: Dilemma

Post by Rambutan »

mario92 wrote: Thu Jan 18, 2024 4:14 am Hello all, do You think is good idea to leave My family (parents) without their permission or without telling them? Would they became sad? Is it Bad? I'm in hard problem.
Not a good idea.
You are not ready to leave home yet.
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mario92
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Re: Dilemma

Post by mario92 »

Thank You everyone :namaste:
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cappuccino
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Re: Dilemma

Post by cappuccino »

mario92 wrote: Thu Jan 18, 2024 4:14 am without their permission or without telling them?
This is not 25th century BC
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Rambutan
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Re: Dilemma

Post by Rambutan »

cappuccino wrote: Sun Jan 21, 2024 4:49 pm
mario92 wrote: Thu Jan 18, 2024 4:14 am without their permission or without telling them?
This is not 25th century BC
1. Different cultures have different standards.
2. The OP author might not be an adult, legally.
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mario92
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Re: Dilemma

Post by mario92 »

My father is 60 years old with arterial hypertension cardiac problem, everytime i complain about anyone (a criminal employee, or criminal guest) he starts yelling me ( he is wrathful) because i just tell him the truth, he just cover the truth and Say that im mad. I have fear that he could die because of it and i'm considering leaving My Home i don't want to go to Avicii, any sugestion or advice? Thank You. Help please
santa100
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Re: Dilemma

Post by santa100 »

mario92 wrote: Sun Mar 24, 2024 11:19 pm My father is 60 years old with arterial hypertension cardiac problem, everytime i complain about anyone (a criminal employee, or criminal guest) he starts yelling me ( he is wrathful) because i just tell him the truth, he just cover the truth and Say that im mad. I have fear that he could die because of it and i'm considering leaving My Home i don't want to go to Avicii, any sugestion or advice? Thank You. Help please
Seems like there's an easy solution. If you already know full well that complaining about someone would result in the same exact response from your father, that it won't help solving anything, then why keep doing that? By abstaining from that, hopefully both you and your father can co-exist together in peace. Now I'm not aware of the full picture about the dynamics of you and your dad's situation, but a little bit of skillful actions in speech, thought, and action can really go a long way in terms of maintaining peace and harmony. Good luck!
SarathW
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Re: Dilemma

Post by SarathW »

mario92 wrote: Thu Jan 18, 2024 4:14 am Hello all, do You think is good idea to leave My family (parents) without their permission or without telling them? Would they became sad? Is it Bad? I'm in hard problem.
I think running away from home is an attitude of young people.
This is very common in Sri Lanka
I have seen dozens of running away kids working in my father's shop.
Parents come and take them home or they run away from my father's shop too.
I wanted to run away from home too. :D

you are an adult and still want to run away it is a big problem.
Speak to a psychologist.

However, I have seen many adult women run away from home (husbands)

I feel sorry for you. But don't know what to say.
:(
“As the lamp consumes oil, the path realises Nibbana”
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mario92
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Re: Dilemma

Post by mario92 »

Thank You Sarath and santa :namaste:
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