Coming back to Dhamma

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joch_ixtab
Posts: 7
Joined: Sat Jun 22, 2024 12:24 am

Coming back to Dhamma

Post by joch_ixtab »

Hello, I go by joch here, 27 years of age, male

After a loooong journey of wandering around trying to find my Self/straighten my relationship with God/find a ritual practice and ishta devata that is suitable for me/find a sense of communitas amongst spiritually minded people in Hindu spaces from Advaita Vedanta to Śaivism I’ve made my way back to trying to get started in the learning and practice of Dhamma.

It’s difficult for me to explain why I’ve suddenly made this choice. But I’ll have a go at it. All this time I’ve been struggling with chronic anxiety and clinical depression for which I’ve been hospitalized for several times in the past and have been in the process of recovering from. I’m okay now, but it’s around this time that I’m asking myself what will really help. What will really lead to moral and spiritual progress and unshaken peace of mind.

Ritual propitiation helps but was hit and miss. Sometimes I felt the presence of the deity, other times a sense of anger and separative grief at not getting the experience I arrived for. Meditation on the Self helped me through so many things. But could backfire just as easily in short term situations where I would not be able to find my sense of “I” or at the very worst suffer from derealization.

But what really helped me was mindfulness of my surroundings, my own body, and my mind and a propensity towards moral awareness of my thoughts and actions. I began to be compelled to read more about the Thai Forest Tradition of Luang Por Chah, Luang Por Mun etc., which I had explored briefly before from a more academic standpoint. And what I found squared well with personal experience. I began to notice which beliefs and practices I adopted were and weren’t conductive towards morality, overall wellbeing and spiritual life.

I’m continuing to learn more and am intrigued every step of the way. That there is a way out of this, no one is coming to save me and no person is beyond saving themselves.

I hope to this develop the tools conductive towards saving myself. Am determined not to end here, and look forward to the journey ahead.

Thank you all, and glad to be here!

Metta :anjali:
Sam Vara
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Posts: 14024
Joined: Sun Jun 05, 2011 5:42 pm
Location: Portsmouth, U.K.

Re: Coming back to Dhamma

Post by Sam Vara »

Welcome to Dhamma Wheel, joch. I hope you find what you are looking for. :anjali:
SarathW
Posts: 21684
Joined: Mon Sep 10, 2012 2:49 am

Re: Coming back to Dhamma

Post by SarathW »

:hello:
“As the lamp consumes oil, the path realises Nibbana”
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DNS
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Location: Las Vegas, Nevada, Estados Unidos de América
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Re: Coming back to Dhamma

Post by DNS »

Welcome to DW!

Intentionjohn
Posts: 50
Joined: Tue Feb 06, 2024 5:48 pm

Re: Coming back to Dhamma

Post by Intentionjohn »

Alll the best and welcome :candle:
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bodom
Posts: 7224
Joined: Fri Jan 09, 2009 6:18 pm
Location: San Antonio, Texas

Re: Coming back to Dhamma

Post by bodom »

Welcome!

:anjali:
Liberation is the inevitable fruit of the path and is bound to blossom forth when there is steady and persistent practice. The only requirements for reaching the final goal are two: to start and to continue. If these requirements are met there is no doubt the goal will be attained. This is the Dhamma, the undeviating law.

- BB
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retrofuturist
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Joined: Tue Dec 30, 2008 9:52 pm
Location: Melbourne, Australia
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Re: Coming back to Dhamma

Post by retrofuturist »

Greetings Joch,

Welcome to Dhamma Wheel.

Metta,
Paul. :)
"Whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things."
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mario92
Posts: 1101
Joined: Wed Jul 24, 2013 1:37 am

Re: Coming back to Dhamma

Post by mario92 »

Hello welcome to dhammawheel :anjali:
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